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The assumption is that if men want sex all the time, and you're a man whose preference is men, surely any man will do and there's a smorgasbord of sexual opportunities out there for you. Photo / Getty Images

Comment: What everyone wants to know about gay men

10 Jun, 2018 3:04pm
4 minutes to read

This is for the curious, open-minded, but misinformed heterosexuals, writes Lee Suckling.

LIFESTYLE

The question everyone wants to ask about gay men

8 Jun, 2018 8:19am
4 minutes to read

This is for the curious, open-minded, but misinformed heterosexuals, writes Lee Suckling.

In 2018 we're getting lost in this sea of technicolour. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: Are Kiwi men being conned by fashion?

6 Jun, 2018 10:47am
3 minutes to read

As fashion consumers, we are being convinced these clothes are a good idea. They're not.

When you're going on a date, should you utilise these sorts of garments and accentuate your body, and is there any dishonesty in that? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

The sex files: Is this underwear wrong for a first date?

1 Jun, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

Getting dressed for a first date? Is it wrong to wear 'body-enhancing' underwear?

Is there not a more flattering option than the current styles of pyjamas? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

The problem with your winter pyjamas

29 May, 2018 7:00am
3 minutes to read

It's officially pyjama season and Lee Suckling is not happy about it - here's why.

By ditching one of these items your daily commute could become a whole lot better, says Lee Suckling. Image / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

The item you need to stop wearing in public

24 May, 2018 9:14am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling has a big problem with how attached we all are to wearing these in public.

Instagram could be the key to finding the love of your life. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why Instagram is the new Tinder

22 May, 2018 9:06am
5 minutes to read

Lee Suckling on why dating apps are a waste of time and Instagram is the place for love.

Generally, those who go to a sex party are all up for a similar experience and have mutual fetishes. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: The truth about sex parties

18 May, 2018 9:46am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling details what really happens.

I realise I'm starting to sound like a white male privilege apologist here. Nevertheless, I come at this from a position of non-privilege. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Do you realise how privileged you are?

16 May, 2018 1:17pm
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling on privilege among those who don't yet understand it.

So many external factors can trump one's interest in sex. Here are some of my libido killers. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What kills a sex columnist's libido?

10 May, 2018 7:22am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling reveals what hinders his own sex drive. Is it any different to your own?

Debrett's, the world's trusted source on social etiquette and behaviour, actually provides us with a good set of rules for vapers. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: The problem with men who vape

8 May, 2018 9:36am
3 minutes to read

Lee Suckling on why men need an etiqutte lesson when it comes to vaping.

Keeping warm and happy can be near impossible tasks come winter time. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: How I'm going to survive winter

4 May, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

Here come cold days, a flat social life and weight gain. But Lee Suckling has a plan.

There are groups of people that believe the myth they're not at risk with unprotected sex. This is a lie. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: You're using condoms wrong

30 Apr, 2018 7:00am
5 minutes to read

Explicit content: Lee Suckling explains the "right" and "wrong" ways to use a condom.

I was knowledgeable that he was not single when we met, and bought into his trick of explaining his existing relationship was already on the rocks. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How I learned I was dating a serial cheater

19 Apr, 2018 8:53am
4 minutes to read

Speaking from experience, these are the signs to look out for.

A model on the runway at Arab Fashion Week in Riyadh. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why 'revealing' fashion is coming to an end

17 Apr, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

As Saudi Arabia hosts its first Arab Fashion Week, style is covering up in the West too.

Do you often get disheartened when people let you down? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What to do when someone disappoints you

13 Apr, 2018 7:20am
4 minutes to read

We all have that one friend who's constantly bailing on plans. Here's how to deal with it.

Sleeping man set. Many views of sleep. Front, side, rear, top. lie on the tummy, Sleep on one's side, lie supine, Various gestures. cartoon of male guy in pajamas. Vector illustrations isolated

LIFESTYLE

How more sleep has changed my life

6 Apr, 2018 7:00am
5 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: Miraculous changes I've seen since getting eight hours of shut eye a night.

As a gay man, I'm used to this kind of behaviour being chastised as the pejorative. I grew up in a world where boys and men exclaimed

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: Are Kiwis becoming more 'homosocial'?

4 Apr, 2018 8:31am
4 minutes to read

Comment: Is the toxicity of modern masculinity slowly fading in New Zealand?

In movie sex, there are never any problems making it happen: everybody clicks together like Lego pieces. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

The lies Hollywood tells us about sex

30 Mar, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

Sex is not as easy as it is in movies. Lee Suckling explains what Hollywood gets wrong.

LIFESTYLE

What sexual dreams really reveal about you

22 Mar, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: Is your subconscious alerting you to unfulfilled desires?

When it comes to role-playing via Xbox, I want to be Lara Croft, not a personality-devoid male soldier from Call Of Duty. Photo / AP

LIFESTYLE

Why I love strong women more than men

21 Mar, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: "Cooler, faster and smarter than men, these are the women I want to be."

We all know the awkward feeling of having to cancel plans. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

The polite way to cancel on someone

14 Mar, 2018 7:26am
4 minutes to read

Cancelling plans can be a tricky business, but Lee Suckling may have mastered the art.

Kim Kardashian is the orginal thirst trapper. She's been trapping for over a decade, in fact. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How to tell if you've been caught in a 'thirst trap'

9 Mar, 2018 7:00am
3 minutes to read

You've probably been trapped today. Lee Suckling chronicles the social media phenomenon.

Costs that you theoretically know about, but never really get full appreciation of until you see the actual bills, add up to making your 30s so expensive.

LIFESTYLE

Revealed: The most expensive year of your life

7 Mar, 2018 7:30am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling reveals the age when finances really start to hurt.

Lee Suckling wants you to push your bedrooom fears aside and enjoy sex. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Sex issues you should never feel bad about

2 Mar, 2018 7:00am
3 minutes to read

It's time to stop judging yourself and have fun in the bedroom, writes Lee Suckling.

Do you find yourself constantly dissatisfied? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Do you suffer from chronic dissatisfaction?

28 Feb, 2018 1:44pm
4 minutes to read

While Instagram may make it tough, Lee Suckling explains how to stop thinking life's lame.

Why are we so attracted to nasty, artificial yellow food? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why you should never eat hot chips again

23 Feb, 2018 7:00am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling looks at what's really in hot chips and why they shouldn't be called food.

Marriage can be difficult, frustrating, and feel time consuming. But in a good marriage these feelings are acute, not chronic. They're not work. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why a good marriage is not work

21 Feb, 2018 8:11am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: Our parents tell us a marriage requires work. Here's where they're wrong.

When you first discuss kinks with somebody, you should make the upmost effort to make them feel safe. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How to discuss something kinky with a partner

14 Feb, 2018 8:40am
4 minutes to read

When it comes to explaining desires to partners, many people are too shy.

What's the ideal amount of exercise to get in order to optimise your sex drive? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Is the gym killing your sex drive?

12 Feb, 2018 1:11pm
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling discusses the tipping point in which too much exercise impacts libido.

Just because nobody can see you, or nobody will say anything, doesn't mean littering is permissible. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: I'm ashamed of this dirty Kiwi habit

7 Feb, 2018 12:01pm
4 minutes to read

Dirty Kiwis, you need to change your attitudes, writes Lee Suckling.

A black and white image of a freckled boy looking thoughtfully, down away from the camera.

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: How I learned to like my freckles

2 Feb, 2018 12:05pm
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: I am one big walking freckle. But I'm not ashamed of them anymore.

What's important in personal grooming is to never leave mess for anybody else. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What you need to know about personal grooming

31 Jan, 2018 11:46am
4 minutes to read

This is the personal grooming etiquette we should all follow, writes Lee Suckling.

Sex toys are stigmatised because we have given them

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: We need to talk about sex toys

26 Jan, 2018 8:16am
5 minutes to read

Lee Suckling discusses why sex toys shouldn't remain taboo in modern society.

Surveys always give us the same most common reasons for divorce: money, family/in-laws, religion, sex, infidelity, and so on. Top of the list is always communication, though. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: How to avoid Divorce Month

17 Jan, 2018 8:05am
4 minutes to read

Having relationship issues? Use this article as a prompt to help work them out.

How far is too far when it comes to touching? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Do you know what constitutes 'appropriate touching'?

12 Jan, 2018 7:00am
5 minutes to read

Lee Suckling on why 2018 is the year to finally talk about what constitutes inappropriate.

Should we be censoring sexual material from our kids? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How do we shelter kids from sex in the media?

10 Jan, 2018 10:02am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling on why we need to change our tune on trying to censor what our kids see.

One of the things that makes a holiday romance alluring is the time stamp that's on it. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What you need to know about summer romances

8 Jan, 2018 9:07am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling's top tips to stop a summer romance becoming a disastrous affair.

To those Kiwis who are camping this summer, I wish you all the best. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why I don't go camping

5 Jan, 2018 6:00am
4 minutes to read

Here's why Lee Suckling has turned down all his invites to go camping this summer.

It's lying - not infidelity - that rocks a relationship's foundation to the core. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

One thing more important than monogamy

20 Dec, 2017 7:24am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling explains why, as we approach 2018, it's time to rethink monogamy.

LIFESTYLE

The problem with being a straight Kiwi man in 2017

15 Dec, 2017 7:03am
4 minutes to read

COMMENT If you fit this description, you probably feel like your identity's under siege.

The more I saw the human form through the eyes of others, the more I thought it was something that couldn't just be bandied about - willy nilly, as it were. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why are Kiwis so afraid of nudity?

13 Dec, 2017 8:45am
4 minutes to read

Naked bodies are never surprising, so why do we still act so shocked when we see them?

LIFESTYLE

Do you feel replaceable in your relationship?

7 Dec, 2017 3:07pm
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling looks at what's at play when we're faced with this feeling.

My proposal, with the exception of very close mates who want me in the wedding party is that you don't have to invite me to your wedding. Save your money. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: Please don't invite me to your wedding

7 Dec, 2017 3:05pm
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling used to be offended when he missed out on a wedding invite.

Regrettably, many of my peers have a very laissez-faire attitude to HIV testing. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: What I learned from my first HIV test

1 Dec, 2017 9:37am
3 minutes to read

On World Aids Day, Lee Suckling shares his experience from his first HIV test.

I have a seemingly trivial way of getting through the days when terrible stuff just keeps happening. I put on a better outfit. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: The secret to turning around a bad day

29 Nov, 2017 10:55am
3 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: How to get through those days where terrible stuff just keeps happening.

Novelty condoms have never really made sense to me: why you'd want your penis to resemble a Christmas tree is confounding. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Revealed: The real point of coloured condoms

22 Nov, 2017 6:00am
3 minutes to read

Novelty condoms have never made sense to me, writes Lee Suckling. Here's why they exist.

Struggling to get to sleep? Lee Suckling is here to help. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Sleeping tips from an anxious, overworked person

17 Nov, 2017 4:36pm
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling shares candid sleep tips that you too can implement into your busy life.

Do I condone drinking alone? In context, yes. I don't think it's as black and white as others suggest.

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: What's wrong with drinking alone?

15 Nov, 2017 1:16pm
3 minutes to read

Is drinking alone always cause for concern? No, says Lee Suckling. Here's why.

It's a hard task to figure out how to tell people when you're not OK, without bringing on the pity party. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How to tell someone you're not OK

10 Nov, 2017 12:17pm
3 minutes to read

When someone asks how you are, how often do you reply honestly?

The people on steroids in 2017 just look strong and fit, and they're trying to look stronger and fitter, quicker. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Lee Suckling: How to tell if someone's on steroids

7 Nov, 2017 7:53am
4 minutes to read

No longer just popular among bodybuilders, here are the telling signs of steroid use.

Like young women, teenage boys are used as objects of desire. Their youth is sold to the masses as the pinnacle of beauty. Photo / Dolce & Gabbana

LIFESTYLE

Why are teenage boys used as objects of desire?

2 Nov, 2017 11:57am
3 minutes to read

Using young models changes society's appetite for what's okay to crave, says Lee Suckling.

It's Halloween, so what does that mean for our bodies? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What happens to your body when you're scared?

31 Oct, 2017 11:21am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: It's the scariest day of the year, but what does that mean for your body?

By the time you put on a new t-shirt, your garment likely has a carbon footprint not unlike a slab of butter imported from France. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

The big problem with the shirt on your back

27 Oct, 2017 1:02pm
3 minutes to read

Bagged your shirt for a bargain? Lee Suckling says it's all kinds of wrong.

Alone time teaches you how to appreciate the people around you when they ARE physically there, and not take them for granted. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How to be good at being alone

25 Oct, 2017 7:25am
3 minutes to read

If being without company scares you it's time to switch up the way you go solo.

Marriage used to be the default setting for committed couples, no matter where they sat on the socio-economic scale, today things are a little different. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why only rich Millennials get married

19 Oct, 2017 1:29pm
4 minutes to read

Being a married Millennial is like saying you're a doctor. People are impressed by it.

If your spouse is angry, let them be angry and don't bicker back. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

How to recover from forgetting an anniversary

18 Oct, 2017 10:13am
4 minutes to read

Forgetting an anniversary will break your partner's heart a little. Here's how to mend it.

Upon feeling the physical pain of a hangover (the headaches, upset stomach, and so on) the metaphysical hangover clouds over you. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

You're handling your hangovers wrong

13 Oct, 2017 7:00am
3 minutes to read

Why there's no use crying over spilt milk or, in this case, regurgitated beer.

Nowadays if you walk into a room and only do that sheepish wave, people think you're rude. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

When did we become a nation of huggers?

10 Oct, 2017 1:41pm
4 minutes to read

Nobody in NZ greeted each other with a hug 10 years ago. Lee Suckling asks what's changed.

When should men start thinking about getting Botox? Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What's the right time for men to start getting Botox?

6 Oct, 2017 8:00am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling asks if and when there is a right time to start male Botox.

Personally, I find woollen products blended with any kind of synthetic to be problematic. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

What's your clothing really doing to your skin?

4 Oct, 2017 9:00am
4 minutes to read

Lee Suckling explains how what you're wearing could be affecting your skin.

Adult birthdays have got less and less exciting over the years. Photo / Getty Images

LIFESTYLE

Why your birthday always feels like a let-down

29 Sep, 2017 9:03am
3 minutes to read

Lee Suckling: I remain unconvinced that adult birthdays need celebration at all.