OPINION:
Breaking news: The country is being overtaken with new singletons. The catch is they're also newly divorced.
Yep, according to the latest census, a whopping 1.8 million divorces have taken place over the last year. That's a huge leap from previous years, and as harsh as this might sound, as a single gal looking for fresh talent, all I can say is HUZZAH!
Yep, the pandemic really put couples through their paces.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.Many discovered even more annoying things about their partner from living and breathing the same air for 24 hours a day.
A lot also took offence to their staunchly anti-vax partners – I know at least one close friend who changed their "I do" to "I most definitely don't" after their partner lost their job because they refused to get the vaccine.
And some simply decided they had given it a fair crack, and it was time to call it a day.
Either way, our dating apps are being filled to the brim with divorcees, and as someone who has dated a couple of divorcees in my time, I can highly recommend giving it a go.
Why? Oh for so many reasons.
As you will hear on my podcast with guest (and ex) Stu Laundy, I recently dated a divorced dude and it was a delight.
He wasn't a seasoned pro on Tinder, he hadn't learnt that it is now perfectly acceptable to ask someone out via text, so he actually called me on the phone. Groundbreaking.
He also was in a stage of reflection where he was feeling pretty shitty about the many ways he had stuffed up in his marriage and was determined to not make those mistakes again. Hence being a kind and thoughtful gentleman.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.Having last dated in the 90s, he also didn't realise that "going for a drink" is also a perfectly acceptable date.
/cloudfront-ap-southeast-2.images.arcpublishing.com/nzme/6JDKS2LYI5NEVT54B5RGC3MC3M.jpg)
Nope, on our first date, he picked me up and drove me to a restaurant that he had made a reservation at. It seems like this guy was a unicorn, but no he was just dating like they did in the good ol' days before technology made us lazy.
Another rather niche benefit was his kids. Having never been fond of having my own children, this relationship gave me the joy of having kids around, but also being able to hand them back.
I could enjoy the fun, raucous family dinners, but also a quiet weekend with my partner and a lot of wine when the kids were with their mum. This form of normality was a dream for an independent woman like myself. You could almost say I had the best of both worlds.
There is also the benefit of your new partner having already had what's being termed as the "starter wife" or "starter husband" ie. Their first marriage out of the way.
Yep, your newly divorced lover will have had plenty of time to reflect on why they're first marriage didn't work out, and are more likely to work harder on their future relationships.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.I decided to explore this theory further and had a chat to a friend who was onto his second marriage, and he agreed that dating post first marriage was infinitely better.
He found that he was more aware of what kind of person he was and the kind of person he was after.
Life is completely different in your 40s to what it is in your 20s, and so your dating patterns should be too. He also said he was more secure in his career and had more funds to enjoy dating properly.
Now let me throw some maths into the equation.
With new statistics finding that one-in-three marriages end in divorce – and the average of that first marriage being 12.1 years, if the bloke got married early, he's most likely going to be in his late 30s or early 40s when he hits the dating scene again …. um, hello new blokes to date who are of an acceptable age to date.
So trust me when I say this. Divorcees are the new hot thing in the dating world.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.They really are having their "moment" and so if you choose to be open to it, you really could have your happily ever after.
