Meghan, Duchess of Sussex and Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex during their royal tour of South Africa in September 2019. Photo / Getty Images
OPINION:
Where will you be in October 2021? If the mind-boggling, history-making madness of the last 10 months is anything to go by, we will have all been eaten by giant wasps or killed in an asteroid shower.
However, here's one thing we do know: 12 months (or thereabouts) from now, Meghan, Duchess of Sussex may very well be back in the UK and sitting in the high court after a judge in London ruled that the royal's lawsuit against the Mail on Sunday's parent company could be deferred for mysterious reasons until then. (The case had been set to be heard in January 2021 at the Old Bailey.)
Here's what happened.
On Friday morning (NZT), Justice Warby granted an application made by the duchess' lawyers in a private hearing for the case to be adjourned until "much later next year" with the delay being sought on "a confidential ground".
In making the ruling, Justice Warby said: "I'm confident that we'll be able to find a time in the autumn in October or November in which the trial can be conducted."
So, just to get my trusty calculator out here, with the case originally set down for January and with it now being heard in the autumn of next year, carry the one, divide by three, and you get … about nine months.
It is little wonder then that social media immediately went into a minor meltdown after the decision was handed down with speculation building that Meghan is pregnant with bebé number two.
(At the time of writing, and according to Britain's Telegraph, a spokesperson for the royal would not comment on the reasons for the application to postpone the hearing.)
The Sussex drama – potential and otherwise - did not stop there.
Meghan's estranged father Thomas lodged a witness statement before the court pushing for the trial to start "as quickly as possible", with the 76-year-old saying that "None of my male relatives have ever lived beyond 80 years of age. I am a realist and I could die tomorrow.
"This case is causing me anxiety and I want to get it over with as quickly as possible."
Separately, Meghan's legal team also argued that they needed more to prepare after the court ruled in favour of the Mail in a pre-trial hearing last month and agreed to allow the Mail's lawyers to use the recently published biography Finding Freedom as part of their defence.
Oh man: Father v daughter; a confidential hearing; the threat of a key player shuffling off the mortal coil, the intrigue swirling around a bombshell biography; and a mysterious nine-month postponement … this latest courtroom battle has more twists and turns than a Dynasty reboot scripted by a gaggle of Adderall-fuelled interns.
We have to keep in mind that on the pregnancy front, the very, very intriguing timing of the adjournment might just be pure coincidence and could have absolutely nothing to do with whether Archie is about to get a younger brother or sister.
(Though let's all agree that a heart-melting Sussex Bub is the balm an exhausted, anxious world needs right now.)
However, it is worth pointing out the confidential application to delay was not opposed by the Mail on Sunday. Given the vigorousness of its defence, it seems unlikely it acceded to this simply out of new-found goodwill.
Whether Harry and Meghan are or are not in the family way, Friday's events do raise the question of what it might mean for the royal family if, or perhaps when, they do decide to add to their family. (Heaven knows, they've got the space. Their US$20 million Montecito mansion boasts nine bedrooms.)
For one thing, a new addition to the Sussex clan would most likely be the first grandchild of a future sovereign born as an American citizen.
With Harry and Meghan starting their new TV-producing, celebrity-hanging Californian lives, the symbolism of them welcoming a bub on US soil would be undeniable.
While the arrival of any new wee Mountbatten-Windsor would be a huge cause for celebration back in London, the new baby's birth would represent a certain poignant finality as to what side of the Atlantic gets to claim spiritual ownership of the Sussexes.
For the palace, a potential Sussex pregnancy would also pose something of PR threat. Since January this year, when Harry and Meghan announced they were quitting as full-time working members of the royal family, the do-goodery of the remaining working HRHs has largely been eclipsed by the ongoing Sussex melodrama.
Visiting garden centres, setting up well-intentioned photography competitions and knighting the occasional centenarian can hardly compete with private jets, Hollywood mansions, lurking paparazzi, headline-grabbing court cases on two continents, semi-regular personal revelations and a constant undercurrent of tabloid noise.
On some level, the Sussexes and their new glam existence was always going to suck up the media oxygen. No matter how much Kate, Duchess of Cambridge flirts with blonde highlights or she and husband William have David Attenborough over for a cream tea, they are just never going to be as dazzling and fascinating a story to follow as the Sussexes.
The picture is even less rosy for Prince Charles as he inches inexorably towards the throne.
The entire royal machine is built to support the monarch, with all the other HRHs expected to fall into dutiful, supportive line. That is, traditionally, there is only meant to ever be one star in the royal firmament that matters (hint: it's the person whose face ends up on the money) and no one is allowed to steal the spotlight (for too long) away from them.
But the reality is, Charles and his organic oat biscuit empire are always going to come a pale second and be spectacularly overshadowed by his far more interesting and younger son and daughter-in-law.
Even if Meghan is expecting - and heaven knows the last thing any woman, royal or not, ever wants to contend with is ceaseless, breathless pregnancy speculation - the delay in her case being heard is bad news for the palace.
Justice Warby's ruling means that 2021 will be dogged by this ongoing courtroom drama that has pitted Markle against Markle. (What are the chances that Thomas will quietly bide his time and remain schtum until the Mail's lawyers get their day in court?)
Friday's enigmatic deferral means that next year looks set to be equally dogged by this legal drama – news that surely no royal press secretary would welcome. Rather, the ruling means for them that drumming up public interest in worthy but dreary royal outings to suburban rec centres in the future just got that much harder.
(There is one caveat here. Meghan's lawyers also applied for a summary judgment in the case which, if it was granted, would do away with the trial and instead the matter would be heard by a judge who would consider points of law. This hearing is set down for January 12 and 13 next year.)
In September the duke and duchess announced that they had signed a massive deal with Netflix that could see them earn up to US$130 million to produce TV shows and documentaries. While there have been scant details about the projects they have in the pipeline for the streaming giant, the couple's real life is already making for truly gripping viewing.
If 2020 constituted season one of The Sussexes, I think we can say confidently that season two is going to be positively binge-worthy.
Daniela Elser is a royal expert and writer with more than 15 years' experience
This old-fashioned pie is a classic for a reason.