If you're over 30, congratulations – your Thermomix catalogue is on the way.
Let's face it, as we get older, there are some new things to embrace on the home front and some old things you have to leave behind.
Below are 10 of the latter.
Your share-house mattress
Your mattress should be treated like Joan Rivers treated her face: Replace it every 10 years.
If you still have the one you owned in your share house (or worse, your teenage bedroom) let it be known there are dust mites inside it older than Sir Ian McKellen.
Avoid the impending chiro bill and get yourself a new one immediately if not sooner.
Inflatable furniture
Made from plastic and full of hot air, inflatable seating is the Katie Price of furniture and you need to part ways with it ASAP.
The only thing in your life that should be blowing up is your social media account, so banish this dated nightmare from your place and let your butt experience the joy of sitting on foam.
Soft toys on your bed
Despite him being half-naked, there's nothing sexy about Winnie the Pooh, nor is there a rational explanation for having him on your bed past the age of 18 (and that's being generous).
If you want a potential suitor to explore your honey pot, you need to ditch the soft toys and replace them with some decorative cushions instead.
Plastic cups, plates or cutlery
The only plastic thing that should be touching your lips after 30 is a Maccas straw after a big night out (24 nuggets optional but highly advised).
At home, it's time to graduate beyond melamine tumblers and the sort of plastic cutlery that's best left in your picnic basket.
Old trophies
Nobody needs to know that you took out the Miss Senior Grand Champion Physical Culture Award at age 10.
Nobody needed to know that when you were 10, let alone after 30. As such, it's time to store the trophies away.
Pretend they are one of many leading Hollywood actors and have them stay in the closet.
Dreamcatchers
If you've had dreamcatchers above your bed since you were a kid and you're now over 30, you've caught all the dreams you're going to catch.
At this point, like the Beyonce song, it's less sweet dream and more beautiful nightmare. Consider something above your bed like a mirror instead. You know, so you can take a long hard look at yourself.
Paper floor lamps
Like bad hangovers and itches down there, the paper floor lamp is a rite of passage when living in a shared house through your twenties.
Now that you're a grown up, it's time to purchase a lamp that won't topple over when someone exhales or passes wind in the room.
Anything galactic
Anything remotely related to the solar system or astrology is best left on morning TV with Mystic Meg.
Quilt cover sets with suns, moons and stars on them: not permitted. Glow-in-the-dark tat stuck to the ceiling: absolutely not. Artworks depicting the planets: solely for fifth graders.
Corkboards
After 30, cork is best left off boards and in champagne bottles.
That's not to say you can't have a board up at home, just evolve and install something covered in a fabric like felt.
It looks far better than cork and won't make your home look like a dated dorm room.
Shot glasses
Shot glasses and booze sat out on display, like Martha on Celebrity Apprentice, begs the question, why are they still there?
By all means keep barware on hand, just enclose it in a cabinet where it belongs.
Snooki and The Situation should not be your style icons.
Chris Carroll is the Melbourne-based designer behind TLC Interiors; an interior design studio and home style blog helping everyday Aussies transform their spaces without breaking the bank. www.tlcinteriors.com.au | Instagram