Long-term happiness is within reach. Photo / 123RF
In a world filled with uncertainty, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.
Many of us are juggling everyday responsibilities, comparing ourselves to others on social media, or chasing goals that never quite bring the fulfilment we expect. But true happiness comes from within, and there are ways to cultivate it, even in challenging times.
To mark International Happiness Day (March 20), we spoke to leading experts in psychology, workplace wellbeing, and personal development to uncover their best strategies for long-term happiness. Here’s what they had to say:
How often do you feel trapped in an invisible cage of your own making?
Katia Vlachos, reinvention coach and author of Uncaged: A Good Girl’s Journey to Reinvention, explains that many of us unconsciously do so from fear of change, self-doubt, and the expectations or approval of others.
“We stay in jobs that drain us, relationships that limit us, and routines that deplete us, all because stepping beyond what we know feels terrifying.”
“Real, lasting happiness comes not from checking all the boxes or reaching some imaginary finish line; it comes from leading a life that honours what truly matters to us,” Vlachos adds.
To do so, she recommends starting by “questioning long-held beliefs, making choices that truly light you up, and saying no to sacrificing your needs for others.”
Many people spend years chasing promotions or higher salaries, only to find that external rewards don’t necessarily lead to long-term fulfilment.
The real key to happiness at work is finding meaning in what you do, according to Lord Mark Price, founder of WorkL and author of Happy Economics: Why The Happiest Workplaces Are The Most Successful.
He says: “A sense of purpose gives meaning to the tasks you do each day, turning them from routine duties into something that genuinely matters”.
“To find it, start by reflecting on what drives you. What aspects of your role energise you? How does your work contribute to a bigger picture; whether that’s helping customers or driving positive change?”
The idea is that aligning our job roles with our values enables work to become a source of satisfaction: “When people understand why their work matters, they feel more valued and motivated”.
Life is full of challenges, but how we perceive and respond to them makes all the difference.
Greg Sumner, author of Every Cloud: Perspective is Everything, rebuilt his life after a devastating car crash left him paralysed. He emphasises the importance of mindset in happiness, by focusing on what’s good in our lives.
“Positivity isn’t about pretending life is perfect; it’s about believing in your ability to change, adapt, and overcome situations. Happiness isn’t about what you don’t have — it’s about appreciating what is already yours.”
During challenging times, he recommends zooming out: “Instead of letting problems consume you, take a step back, look at the bigger picture. Will this issue matter in a week? A month? A year? Perspective changes everything.”
Technology is designed to make life easier, but convenience doesn’t always equate to happiness. When we rely too much on convenience, we can miss out on meaningful experiences.
Menka Sanghvi, author of Your Best Digital Life: Use Your Mind to Tame Your Tech, suggests being more mindful about the conveniences we embrace.
“Think about convenience as a spectrum and connect with your personal values to make these choices.
“By experimenting, you can figure out when it’s worth making the extra effort or tolerating some discomfort to have a more meaningful experience — whether it’s finishing that documentary you care about [rather than mindlessly scrolling] or cooking a meal at home [instead of defaulting to fast food].
“The more we practise this discernment, the more we’ll be able to pick and choose the conveniences that lead to fulfilment and happiness, and reject the ones that don’t.”
The way we talk about our lives shapes our experience. If we constantly frame ourselves as victims of circumstance, we can feel powerless.
Dr Helmut Schuster and Dr David Oxley, co-authors of A Groundhog Career: A tale of career traps and how to escape them, believe reframing our narrative can help us to find joy.
“The trains were cancelled today … so I had to cycle to work … in 40 degrees … up and down a live volcano … that erupted …. I had to repair two flat tyres. But did anyone appreciate my effort? When we get trapped into painting ourselves as the victim of our circumstances, we become our own worst enemies.”
The solution? “Start rewriting your story with you as the hero.” Look at daily challenges, like the mundane commute, as adventures rather than burdens, and happiness will follow.
We often think that happiness and success go hand in hand, but true success is about aligning your goals with what truly fulfils you.
Mark Wilkinson and Paul Grant, co-authors of Money Remixed: the 14 Steps to a Wealthy Mindset, advocate for developing a ‘success mindset’ by defining your vision and purpose in life – what truly motivates you.
“Your vision is a clear picture of your future, while your purpose is the deeper reason behind your actions. To find them, explore your passions, values, and strengths. Clarify what impact you want to make in the world and align your efforts toward that.”
Once you know this, it’s easier to turn this vision into reality with goal-setting. Visualising success and surrounding yourself with positive influences will help you reach these, and create lasting happiness.
Sometimes, unhappiness at work spills over into our home lives, but it’s easier than you think to reshape the job you have without having to find a new one.
Tim Duggan, author of Work Backwards: The Revolutionary Method to Work Smarter and Live Better, highlights ‘job crafting’ as a way to boost happiness at work.
“Anyone can practise job-crafting by taking note throughout the day of which areas you personally find meaningful at work and altering your workload to emphasise those areas.
“Most of us have more leeway than we realise in how we do our jobs, and scores of researchers have now proven that making small changes to the way you work can help boost your happiness and make it last.”
Happiness often comes from believing in our work and passions, that they relate to the rest of the world and we are recognised for them.
Philip Atkinson, author of Bee Wise: 12 Leadership Lessons from a Busy Beehive, recommends a unique model for finding happiness through this alignment.
“The Ikigai Model looks at three overlapping circles: what we are good at, what we love to do and what the world needs.
“At the intersection of these is our purpose - or our UCW, unique contribution to the world. When that is in alignment with where we put our energy, we are working with the world, not against it. Happiness comes from that sweet spot.”
Neuroscience shows that our thoughts shape our reality, but that we do have control over this.
Aaron Surtees, clinical hypnotherapist and author of Subconsciously: Powerful Stories of Lives Changed through Hypnotherapy and How You Can Do the Same, explains: “Your brain has neuroplasticity, meaning it can be trained and neural pathways re-wired for positivity”.
“Challenge negative thoughts, practise affirmations, and focus on what’s going right.”
He also recommends using this new-found control to practise gratitude, something he says can help reset a happier mindset.
Workplace stress can have a huge impact on overall happiness, but changing our mindset about work can make a big difference, according to Zoe Sinclair, workplace wellbeing expert and founder of mental wellbeing conference This Can Happen.
“Simple changes of mindset from ‘I need to finish this document before I leave work today’ to ‘I want to finish this document before I leave work today’ just changes the internal narrative slightly.”
This simple technique can ward off ‘work overspill’, something that impacts work-life balance and even our ability to sleep. But the key is to have open and honest conversations at work when stress is impacting us, and always remember: “Stepping away from your desk and going for a quick walk never made anything worse”.
The way we speak to ourselves matters, from our confidence to our choices.
Sandra Roycroft-Davis, a behavioural change specialist and the author of The Weight’s Over: Take Back Control says: “If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself. Replace self-criticism with kindness”.
She believes small everyday habits create big change, such as high-fiving yourself in the mirror every morning and saying one kind thing. “Small shifts create big change - and that’s where lasting happiness begins.”
Positivity literally rewires our brain, Sandra says, and can “make us feel more in control, more resilient, and more at peace”.
Happiness isn’t just a feeling — it’s a lifelong skill we can all cultivate.
By making small, consistent changes in how we think, work, and engage with the world, we can create happiness that lasts well beyond International Happiness Day.
Matariki celebrations will be taking place across the country throughout the weekend.