You've had nearly too much to drink during the stress of hosting the family Christmas lunch and you just feel like a good cry ...
Love Story (1970) You've agonised for hours over the table setting. Do you go with the modern navy and rose gold colour scheme or the classicserveware you inherited from Nana? Which napkins work best? And for Chrissake what about the centrepiece? An experimental twigs-and-driftwood construction or a time-honoured, simple posy? It's all too much, you've hydrated with several stiff gin and tonics or few too many "white whines" and now feel on the edge of a teary meltdown. Luxuriate in it! You could watch that Christmassy confection Love Actually, but heck, why don't you go all out and watch the classic tearjerker, Love Story, instead? It might be a bit dated but it's still a deeply affecting, melodrama-drenched tale of star-crossed lovers that ends in the tragedy you know is coming.
Get the tissues out for Love Story.
Your old friends from France unexpectedly show up to stay ...
Boy (2010) You love your old chums and while you're happy to see them, you're exhausted. Maybe what you need is to share a good cackle with them. Have they seen Boy, Taika Waititi's irresistible coming-of-age story of the highest order? It's a big-hearted quintessentially Kiwi film that could only have been made in New Zealand. Striking the perfect balance between tender and hilarious, Boy transcends any kind of cultural barriers. And your friends will soak up the stunning Waihau Bay, East Coast, setting.
If you want to show off by looking cinematically savvy to your niece who has just finished her studies at film school ...
Mulholland Drive (2001) Look informed and knowledgeable as you point out that the deliriously bizarre Mulholland Drive is David Lynch's modernised take on Hitchcock's Vertigo and eerily foreshadowed the creepy turn Hollywood has taken in recent times. Strangely compelling yet utterly non-linear, you might not know what the heck is going on but your niece will think you are pretty cool.
Be the cool aunt, choose Mulholland Drive.
You are looking after the small, boisterous children from next door ...
The Lego Movie (2014) They're doing your head in. Your neighbour promised to leave them with you for only a couple of hours. Their squeals hit bewildering frequencies and they've tipped their barrel of thousands of tiny unidentifiable Lego pieces (which you keep tripping over) on the floor. How to keep them occupied? The Lego Movie! Kids of all ages will love it. The children will be stunned into silence over the dizzying Lego vistas and the adults will get a kick out of the pop culture references for grown-ups. Win-win!
Your family are prone to endless bickering but you're stuck with each other for the whole day ...
Little Miss Sunshine (2006) Ever had that unshakeable feeling that everybody else's family is normal and yours is completely dysfunctional? Dreading the thought of spending Christmas Day in close proximity to siblings who refuse to talk to each other over a tiff that escalated into a feud that nobody can remember how it started? Rather than take on the draining emotional labour of being the peacemaker, pop on Little Miss Sunshine. A comedy with the motley cast of a Proust scholar, a motivational speaker, a teenager obsessed with the cheery philosophy of Nietzsche, and an aspiring beauty queen - it won't take long for things to come into perspective and for you to realise your family isn't that strange after all.
Your family will seem normal after watching Little Miss Sunshine.
You're as stuffed as a Christmas turkey and just want to blob out and watch a classic, silly but entertaining action film ...
Die Hard (1988) Whether or not you've waded into the recent heated debate about whether it's a Christmas film or not, if you crave a bit of explosive escapism, you can't go wrong with thrilling action flick Die Hard. It's the cinematic equivalent of slipping into something more comfortable and you don't have to think too hard. Sardonic vigilante cop John McClane (Bruce Willis) smashes out endless, crack-up one liners as he single-handedly struggles to save a group of high-rise partygoers from a hostage situation. It kicks off on Christmas Eve so you can argue that it's festive, the rollicking action takes place in a single building over a single night, there are terrorists and a romantic sub-plot. The perfect holiday classic. "Yippee-ki-yay, motherf***er!"
Slip into something more comfortable with Die Hard.
