Benedict Cumberbatch copped a lot of flak for his 'coloured' remark. Photo / AP
When Murray Deaker ordered a black coffee on a recent flight in the US, he was not expecting a confrontation. The former TV and radio sports commentator was thrown a withering look by the flight attendant before she angrily asked if he instead meant to request coffee without milk?
It dawned on Deaker she thought he was making a racist remark. A verbal tug of war at 30,000 feet ensued.
"It suddenly became a big issue and I wouldn't give an inch," Deaker recalls.
"She was full of indignation, kept insisting I meant coffee without milk then almost threw the cup at me."
Deaker is no stranger to being accused of making an insensitive slur. In 2011, he was criticised by the race relations commissioner after describing someone on his Sky TV show as "working like a nigger". The presenter later apologised.
He believes the incident on the flight, however, highlights how political correctness has now gone over the top.
"It is a good example of how crazy it has become about what you can and can't say these days. Now when I order a coffee I deliberately ask for 'a long black for an old white'."
British actor Benedict Cumberbatch is still climbing out of a hole after he fell into the language trap.
The Hobbit star was forced to apologise after talking about "coloured actors" on US television, saying he had been "an idiot" and was "devastated to have caused offence".
Ironically, the "Cumberblunder" came as he was complaining about the lack of diversity on British screens. Speaking to US talk show host Tavis Smiley, he said: "I think as far as coloured actors go it gets really difficult in the UK, and a lot of my friends have had more opportunities here than in the UK, and that's something that needs to change."
His overall message was praised by anti-racism groups but the use of "coloured" overshadowed it.
That has prompted a fortnight of soul-searching and opinionated outpourings about the slip. The black British star of Oscar-nominated civil rights drama Selma, David Oyelowo, called the furore "silly" and "ridiculous".
This week, photographs appeared in the British press of Cumberbatch leaving the set of TV drama Sherlock with a minder in tow.
Most of us have probably let slip the occasional inappropriate word we've later regretted, or had an elderly relative voice cringeworthy terms from a bygone era.
However, some linguistics experts believe social media is changing language faster than ever. They even fear "linguistic engineering" is pushing us to all speak the same way, blurring the vibrant differences between human languages.
The controversial use of words also made headlines in New Zealand in recent weeks. Radio host Sean Plunket branded award-winning Kiwi author Eleanor Catton an "ungrateful hua" after she criticised the Government. The comment was misheard by some as "ungrateful whore", sparking a debate about language and about what "hua" meant.
The "hua" insult was not as outrageous as some famous Kiwi foot-in-mouth moments, such as fellow broadcaster Paul Holmes' "cheeky darkie" remarks and Paul Henry's derogatory comment about an Indian diplomat with the surname "Dikshit".
However, Dr Moyra Sweetnam Evans, senior lecturer in English and Linguistics at the University of Otago, says the Cumberbatch incident shows how quickly language previously regarded as innocuous can suddenly become unacceptable.
"From a linguistics stance, it is not the words that cause offence but the context they are used in," she says. "Because of social media, the increasing speed that language is changing means it is difficult for people to keep up with what is acceptable and what is not. Cumberbatch fell into that trap."
Cultural differences can easily cause confusion, too. "A fruit called a kaffir lime is popular in New Zealand," she says. "In South Africa, the word kaffir is deemed to be such a derogatory term towards black people it is illegal and South Africans coming to New Zealand cringe when they hear the word used."
With an increasingly multi-cultural population in New Zealand, in general Kiwis are proud of being seen as having a polite and respectful outlook.
But research published by the Broadcasting Standards Authority indicates perceptions of swear words on TV and radio has changed significantly in recent years.
Surveys show 70 per cent of people thought the f-word was unacceptable in 1999 but by 2013 this had dropped to 50 per cent. Previously, 42 per cent also believed "bitch" was unacceptable but by 2013 just 28 per cent thought it was offensive.
Professor Stephen May, from Auckland University's Faculty of Education, says changes in language also flow the other way. The word "chick" is regarded as being insulting by feminists from the 1970s and 1980s but is making a comeback among groups of young Kiwi women as being a trendy way to describe themselves, he explains.
"Swag is another word that is popular with young people to describe someone as cool. But in the 1960s it was an underground code for the gay community.
"Words are being reappropriated all the time so it is little wonder this can lead to confusion."
Political blogger David Farrar believes social media has also led to a vocal minority having the biggest sway when it comes to influencing language and attitudes. Farrar has been documenting "PC madness" in New Zealand for many years.
A favourite example was when an Air New Zealand in-flight safety video depicting All Black Richard Kahui turning down a peck on the cheek from a male flight attendant was pulled in 2010 after complaints it was "homophobic".
"The problem we now have is that people are getting offended on behalf of others," Farrar says. "The gay attendant who starred in the video said he loved it and couldn't understand what all the fuss was about.
"Social media helps fuel this kind of thing. People are waiting by their mobile devices to be outraged, then they share that outrage on Twitter as quickly as they can."
Multimillionaire businessman and author Sir Bob Jones is well known for ridiculing political correctness.
He believes the Cumberbatch row is "childish" and thinks politically correct speech can usually be traced to groups failing to cope with modern society.
"Arbitrarily changing everyday usage becomes a disguise for perceived progress, contrary to the evidence," Jones says.
"For example, if a woman gained the top position of a management group it became fashionable to address her as the chairman.
"When the absurdity of this came home it was reduced to an even sillier, 'the chair'. She's the bloody 'chairwoman', for God's sake."
Not all commentators agree that the public policing of language has gone too far.
Herald on Sunday columnist Paul Little regularly pokes fun at life's absurdities but reckons there is a place for the PC brigade, to keep the rich and famous in check.
"Cumberbatch will pull through this rocky patch and has his money, movies and his look-a-like wife as comfort," he says.
"The people down the pecking order are entitled to put their hands up and complain about what he says and remind him it is important to use language wisely.
"We can't just keep maintaining patronising prejudices that have been handed down for decades."
Linguistic expert Sweetnam Evans expects the increasingly powerful "PC police" to continue to put every word under scrutiny and thinks figures like Cumberbatch and Plunket will find themselves in an increasingly uncomfortable spotlight.
"Political correctness has its roots in politeness and equality and that's fine," she says.
"But what we don't want happening is that a minority starts to influence the way people speak and the words they use through linguistic engineering, which is what is happening.
"If we keep dictating to others about how to use our own language it will remove creativity. It will eventually lead to us all talking the same way. What kind of world would that be?"
Washington Post: Sweatpants? No. But elastic waistbands? Absolutely.