Nudists give couple bum's rush

CANBERRA - Someone was definitely not the kind of fun, cool, calm, smart, sassy and social soul the White Cockatoo was seeking to flesh out its "anything goes" swingers' month.

Fully-clothed Gold Coaster John Harrison, 55, and his wife Lyn were out on their ears after a confrontation with a group of naked women that saw police called to the far north Queensland resort.

Apparently, the women objected to Harrison remaining clothed while they exposed all, despite the rules for the month proclaiming that clothing was optional.

Resort owner Tony Fox agreed, amid mutual harsh words.

Harrison told Brisbane times.com.au that Fox had called him a "d...head".

"He threatened to bash me," Fox retorted.

Hardly the cool image that the White Cockatoo, near Port Douglas, has been promoting in its three-season programme of adults-only March, conventional family resort from April to September, and strictly nudes only between October and December.

Nor is it the kind of publicity that the resort needed for the resumption of swingers' sessions that ended in 2005 following a series of over-the-top sex romps.

More restrained guests had been exposed to a couple in their 50s displaying their libido on a balcony, while others had been propositioned by a woman seeking group sex. Police had also been called to close down an orgy in one of the resort's chalets.

"[We] will openly admit to being wrong in parts of our method of operation ... and certainly way off base in what we thought was a good marketing strategy," Fox later wrote on the resort's website.

Fox and his wife and co-owner Lenore, both long-time nudists and conditioned to being propositioned at other nude venues, figured swingers were just a normal part of the market.

In extending a welcome to what they promoted as "Australia's premier nudist resort", they believed swingers would respect other non-swinging guests.

They were asked to indicate their preferences so discreet introductions could be made to like-minded people.

"How wrong we were," the couple wrote. "Not only have swingers stayed here without indicating their lifestyle choice [but] many of those have blatantly disregarded the most important rule this resort has: 'no means no'."

Swingers were no longer welcome at the resort's nude seasons.

But late last year the resort decided to spice up increasingly gloomy economic times with a return to an "anything goes" March.

"We're not using the words 'sex' or 'swingers', but it doesn't take rocket science to work out what it means," Fox told Brisbane's Courier-Mail.

With strong demand expected to pump A$500,000 ($640,000) into the local economy over a month that the resort warned would definitely not be for "prudie nudies, judgmental fools, indiscreet individuals, or locals".

The rules were simple: use towels on all seats, shower before swimming in the pool, no cameras, no illicit drugs, no public sexual activities and no visitors. Clothing was optional.

But trouble broke out when Harrison appeared fully-dressed while waiting for his wife before dining out.

Four naked women apparently complained to Fox, who was then confronted by the group.

"Fox turned to me out of the blue and said 'why are you dressed?'," Harrison told brisbanetimes.com.au.

"He then said 'well, I think you're being disrespectful to these women by being dressed'.

"He then stormed away and said 'stop being a d...head'."

Fox said he had ordered Harrison out of the resort and called police after Harrison threatened to bash him.

"The four females and myself, and everybody else, without exception, [were] nude and he walked up to me with a beer in his hand," Fox said.

"I only asked him to show a bit of respect."

For Harrison, the White Cockatoo was a bit of a bummer.