NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / World

Lover of twins adds new twist to moral debate

NZ Herald
29 May, 2012 05:30 PM4 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Belle Glasby, Marc Glasby and Dorothy Loader appeared on television talking about their 'poly' relationship. Photo / Supplied

Belle Glasby, Marc Glasby and Dorothy Loader appeared on television talking about their 'poly' relationship. Photo / Supplied

Marc Glasby and his two partners - wife Belle and identical twin sister Dorothy - last night poured new fuel on the growing debate over sexuality and marriage in 21st century Australia.

Their appearance on SBS Television's Insight programme added polyamory to the already furious debate over same-sex marriage and the associated debates over gay adoption and lesbian access to IVF birth programmes.

Advocates of polyamory - intimate relationships involving three or more people - have ruffled feathers in the gay community, caused grief for the Greens, and strengthened religious determination to preserve male-female marriage as the nation's only legal option.

The debate is being hammered out in a parliamentary inquiry into two bills aiming to legalise gay marriage and to recognise those performed abroad.

Gay marriage was a fraught issue long before polyamory's entry. It split the Labor Party and became policy only after Prime Minister Julia Gillard, who opposes the move, struck a deal requiring a conscience vote in Parliament.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

The Opposition opposes same-sex marriage, while the Greens' policy advocates marriage for all, regardless of sexuality or gender identity.

Public opinion is divided. The most recent Galaxy poll put support at 50 per cent. Last night, the polyamorists' case was put by the Glasbys. Marc and Belle had been married and happily monogamous for more than 30 years until Dorothy, who had been separated from her sister at birth, entered the picture.

The three have been in love since. Glasby spends alternate nights with the sisters, after some hiccups working out jealousy issues.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"Until the poly relationship I am now involved in, I was completely faithful to my wife for the 30 years that we have been together," he said.

"If we had not met her sister, and if the unique set of circumstances that we found had not been present, then I would have continued to be a happy, faithful, monogamous husband until the day I died."

Glasby said that while some used the term to describe "swinging" lifestyles, truly polyamorous people needed to clearly differentiate between short-term sexual adventures and long-term committed relationships.

"The whole experience has been amazing," he said. "It was not something we ever expected to happen in our lives, but it has, and day by day we are finding better ways to deal with any problems that arise."

Discover more

New Zealand|politics

Political rivals unite on gay adoptions

27 May 05:30 PM
New Zealand|crime

Teen bashed unconscious in anti-gay attack

29 May 05:30 PM
Opinion

John Roughan: Gay adoption a step too far

01 Jun 05:30 PM
New Zealand

NZ adoption shock for lesbian couple

16 Jun 05:30 PM

But Glasby said it was unfortunate he lived in a society that did not tolerate "multiple marriages" and in which polyamorists could lose friends and face discrimination if they declared their relationships.

"If I had the option, I would most certainly be legally married to both women, as they are both in every respect, except on paper, my wives."

Appearing with the Glasbys was Aboriginal elder Witiyana Marika, a founding member of indigenous rock group Yothu Yindi, who has two wives, says Aboriginal culture supports multiple wives, and argues it strengthens families.

Lebanese Muslim Fatimah Youssef also claimed benefits for women from polygamy, allowed because God knew that "man was weak".

Sierra Leonean Tony Kamara, whose father had two wives and who said polygamy was a normal part of life for the community in Australia, enjoyed his large family but recalled jealousy and fear between the wives.

And psychologist and community worker Eman Sharobeem said religion could subjugate women into accepting polygamous relationships that drove some "to the point of mental health breakdowns".

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Polyamory Australia, one of a number of advocacy and networking websites, claims its community is diverse and growing, with several hundred attending regular meetings, discussion groups and other events, and using online forums.

"We could be rural, inner-city urban or suburban, straight or gay, bi- or asexual ... agnostic, atheist, Christian, wiccan, Buddhist, pagan or Mormon ... dressed as daggy geeks [or] fetish fashionistas ... but our common goal is that of ethical, multiple, intimate relationships and respect for our incredible, wonderful, stimulating diversity," the site says.

Polyamorists and gays have agreed to more open dialogue following a dispute over their "A Brighter Future for All Kinds of Love" float in this year's Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras, eventually settled amicably.

But swinging wider public support their way will be harder.

The Greens have been accused of hypocrisy - even by Christian lobbyists opposing gay unions - for supporting same-sex marriage while denying polyamorists the same right.

And just getting gay marriage accepted will tough enough. During the parliamentary hearings the proposal was rejected by all religious groups except Buddhists and the Union for Progressive Judaism, political support is uncertain, and many Australians remain unconvinced.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Save

    Share this article

Latest from World

World

Minnesota lawmaker killed in ‘politically motivated assassination’ - governor

14 Jun 07:11 PM
Premium
World

The Latin American country that told Elon Musk ‘no’

14 Jun 07:00 PM
World

Israel, Iran trade threats as conflict escalates

14 Jun 06:48 PM

It was just a stopover – 18 months later, they call it home

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from World

Minnesota lawmaker killed in ‘politically motivated assassination’ - governor

Minnesota lawmaker killed in ‘politically motivated assassination’ - governor

14 Jun 07:11 PM

A manhunt is underway for the suspect.

Premium
The Latin American country that told Elon Musk ‘no’

The Latin American country that told Elon Musk ‘no’

14 Jun 07:00 PM
Israel, Iran trade threats as conflict escalates

Israel, Iran trade threats as conflict escalates

14 Jun 06:48 PM
Kazakhstan selects Russia's Rosatom to lead the construction of its first nuclear plant

Kazakhstan selects Russia's Rosatom to lead the construction of its first nuclear plant

14 Jun 08:54 AM
The woman behind NZ’s first PAK’nSAVE
sponsored

The woman behind NZ’s first PAK’nSAVE

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP