KEY POINTS:
I've been pretty good lately, haven't I? My neighbours finally moved back when I stopped making them form Conga lines every time Obama held a press conference. I'm much better.
The rose petals are out of my teeth and I can almost start to feel pre-presidential criticism burbling
up when Obama talks about troop switcheroos to Afghanistan. Almost, but not yet.
I've promised not to notice Barack Obama's smelly socks on the floor until January 20. The man is supposed to actually take office before the press criticises the job he's not yet doing. I realise it's far cooler right now to diss Obama just for the novelty factor and pat George W. on the head now that he's said he's sorry. We're sorry, too, George.
So let me wax poetic before the gloves come off. Barack Obama, I'm in with you to the depth and breadth of a Big Three American automaker's private jet budget.
I love that the President-elect mentioned in passing that it might be a nice gesture for chief executives not to take multimillion-dollar bonuses this Christmas when their companies' workers are collecting unemployment with a few less zeros attached.
Voila, the Auto Boys are taking a $1-a-year salary, having driven their new hybrids to Washington instead of doing the separate jets thing. How magical to watch them enlist empty, mea culpa PR instead. Honest to God, I think I smell the first whiffs of social responsibility not being dirty words anymore - now there's $34 billion on the table.
It's been an auspicious non-start so far. Somebody should charge journalists 20 bucks every time they use the new cliches 'team of rivals', 'best and brightest' or 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer'. We get it. Obama is delivering the team that he said he would, diverse, bipartisan, contentious - enough to make both sides of the aisle feel appropriate stomach discomfort.
There's enough old Clintonistas to make the left skittish that he's assembling Billary III, The Pantsuit Years. There are familiar faces like Eric Holder [Attorney General], Susan Rice [UN Ambassador, now re-elevated back to a Cabinet position. Welcome back diplomacy!], and surprise, surprise - Hillary, her own true self, as Secretary of State, with Bill not at her side, she swears.
Meanwhile, there are enough centrists keeping their seats at the table to make the right convinced that no one will be happy. Staying on is Robert Gates at the Pentagon [serving under his eighth President!].
Surely the world is whacked when even Karl Rove and Henry Kissinger praise Obama's choices.
Already Obama's style is Audrey Hepburn to Dubya's Britney. Brainiacs are back with a vengeance. Cue the Hallelujah Chorus. Nominees can use their Rhodes scholarship sheepskin instead of IDs to get through security at the White House now. But these are no ivory tower folks. Obama's conservatism is to bet on proven insider experience [Paul Volcker, Larry Summers, Rahm Emanuel, Tom Daschle].
Compare and contrast that to the blind loyalty/payback World o' Bush. W's pick to run the federal emergency agency when New Orleans was drowning was a guy whose sum total of previous experience was running the Arabian Horse Association. Giddy-up.
What's more, diplomacy is sexy again. After all, Hillary is the total Babe Package - with a couple of slight exceptions. The two things she has run, healthcare reform and her presidential campaign, weren't exactly models of management success. Here's hoping she uses an organisational-savvy deputy to control the huge multi-tentacled State Department beast.
If anything, Clinton's appointment is Obama's sole aberration in favour of the idea of a candidate over the actuality of real hands-on diplomatic experience. Hillary has always been a driven, smart, political workhorse who earned the respect of her Senate colleagues. She may be the one wild card worth playing.
Obama's bigger problem is that his picks have big heads to match their big intellect. President No44's line-up isn't so much a team of rivals as potentially a headache of egos. But Obama maintains he's relying on that fight to help combat groupthink.
I can rejoice all I want that smart and seasoned is sexy again, but at the end of the day brains alone won't solve the gigantic pile of crap on America's front porch. Someone is going to have to convince these giants in their field how to play nicely with others to get real solutions working.
While America fiddles with no fully-powered President until the end of January, the economy burns. Everyone wants to see Obama sprint, not jog, out of the blocks. But unemployment queues won't grant this new romance longevity. I give Obama 18 months before America completely forgets that this mess was inherited and blames him for it.
Godspeed, Obi-Wan-bama. You're going to need it.
* www.traceybarnett.co.nz
