New York: Having a ball game

Head to New York's Yankee Stadium to see some big-name baseball stars. Photo / Creative Commons image by Flickr user Shinya Suzuki

In the legendary Yankee Stadium, Andrew Alderson finds fabulous atmosphere - and great chilli dogs - at America's big show.

If you can handle the heavy doses of American patriotism, a day at Yankee Stadium is filled with unadulterated fun.

As baseball ignorami with a Sunday afternoon to spare in New York, my wife and I sought the full take-me-out-to-the-ball game shebang.

As with any well-patronised sports event, merchandise-laden fans injected the passion. We were more interested in ingesting hot dogs, (lite) beer, chilli fries and icecream sundaes from our seats in section 430, far enough from third base that you needn't think about wearing a mitt to pouch wayward foul balls. Still, that's what US$22 ($29) gets you.

We went on Mother's Day to watch the hosts play the Seattle Mariners. For the record, Andy Pettitte was returning to the pitching mound after a 573-day absence and the visitors triumphed 6-2, but that seemed peripheral.

The actual match, while intriguing for avowed cricket purists, was trumped by the pre-match show.

First, there was Sergeant Rex. The 11-year-old German shepherd was led around the bases by his owner, Corporal Megan Leavey. Rex barked from beneath his muzzled snout as the crowd hollered thanks for his war service in Iraq where he sniffed out roadside bombs. The pair were injured on duty when a device detonated in 2006. They rehabilitated together after being flown home first-class from California by - Yankees' sponsor alert - Delta Airlines. After five years' separation, Leavey adopted Rex upon his retirement.

Leavey, in full marine dress uniform, held the leash but, ironically, Rex was her commanding officer.

She was presented with a signed Yankees' jersey before Alex Rodriguez trotted out with a silver bracelet from Tiffany, plus a pendant engraved with the word "Rex". A-Rod gave the pooch the sort of wide berth he'd normally reserve for the United States Anti-Doping Agency. Sergeant Rex gave the confessed performance-enhancing drugs cheat a bit of a hurry-up for his trouble.

The geniuses in the Yankees' marketing department - I pictured a roomful of George Costanzas - deserve credit for making their prized human assets seem like real people happy to engage with their fans. The players also deserve kudos for their self-deprecation.

The entertainment included matching up player baby photos on the big screen; identifying the real voice from three options in which two teammates did mimicry; and a gag in which players chose their favourite superpower (most opted for flying). Something for Super Rugby or our cricket franchises to consider, perhaps?

Completing the pre-match proceedings was a ceremonial first pitch from Erika Rech, creator of the Breast Intentions charity, who lost two aunts to the disease before she and her mum suffered and recovered. The players wore pink sweatbands and wielded pink bats as part of the synergy for the cause.

The whole show was a master-class in choreography, gelled together by a mellifluous Yankees' voice-of-God ground announcer who sounded like an American Selwyn Toogood.

Saturation point threatened later. Mother's Day took its cue with patrons asked to stand in the seventh-inning stretch and belt out Let Me Call You Sweetheart instead of the traditional Take Me Out to the Ball Game. In case larynxes weren't hoarse, they were then requested to deliver a rendition of America the Beautiful for United States' servicemen and women serving in the Middle East.

The blind patriotism from a country whose people have suffered tragedy in myriad external wars knew no bounds. It left an uneasy feeling, as if Fox News was pulling the strings or Joseph McCarthy was reaching out from the grave.

Your pre-game plan

1. Purchase tickets via mlb.com, get them sent to your computer and print them. Pop them into the secret squirrel part of your wallet, ready for substitution into the real thing at Yankee Stadium. US$20-$30 ($26-$40) will secure seats on the fourth tier where not even an industrial-strength foul ball can reach you.

2. Sort out New York flights and accommodation.

3. Purchase a standard subway fare (about $2.50) and alight at East 161st St/River Ave or 161st St/Yankee Stadium (about 25 minutes from Midtown Manhattan) for entry to Babe Ruth Plaza.

4. Go for Eden Park-type fare (hot dog $8, Miller Lite Beer $6, icecream sundae $6.50) or broaden your horizons with a $15 Lobel's steak sandwich, a $20 helmet of nachos from Wholly Guacamole or fresh cookies at Otis Spunkmeyer.

5. Soak up the pre-game atmosphere like you're Yankee Doodle Dandy, before reclining to watch the actual ball game.