Dunedin is New Zealand's best city. One of them anyway.
Definitely in the top 10. Sadly she's taken a devastating hit in recent weeks. Baldwin St is no longer officially the steepest in the world. According to the Guinness Book of Records, some annoying Welsh way runs a biggerangle.
The measurements are dodgy and good people are working on bringing the title back home. So the ruling may well be overturned. But our favourite lower South Island town is hurting.
Sadly it's not the only bad news that's hit our Edinburgh of the South. It comes on the back of Cadbury betraying the town and closing last year. Then a few weeks back a cash register was stolen from the St Vincent de Paul op shop on King Edward St. Thankfully there was no cash in it.
There is no doubt Dunedin is having a bad run. What better time for the rest of the country to show our support. Let's focus on what makes the city great.
A song was written to hype up Dunedin in the 80s. A song designed to excite locals by listing all the great things about our home. It's called Dunedin — It's All Right Here.
Note that it's "all right here" not "alright here". There is a big difference between all right and alright. It's everything vs satisfactory. As a kid my friends and I at Maori Hill Primary changed the words to "Dunedin it's okay, it's not great, It's alright here".
Looking back now I see the song's semi-ironic brilliance. It is "all right" and also "alright" in Dunedin.
There's a terrible quality recording of the song on YouTube. I recommend looking it up and singing along. To make it easier I've gone through and written down the words for you.
So here we go. Here's a rhyming list of all the things that are good about Dunedin written some time in the 1980s by someone.
It's giving all for blue and gold. The landmarks that appear. All the characters that give the place that certain kind of flair. It's the theatre. It's the concerts. It's surfing at St Clair. It's pie and chips at 1am.
It's fog that just won't clear. It's the station. It's the cathedral. It's Robbie's stony stare. It's a little touch of avant-garde you discover here and there. It's the best dressed for those special times. The start of new careers. Dunedin, it's like nothing else 'cause we've got it all right here. It's all right here. Dunedin, it's our town and it's our home and it's all right here.
After reading that you're probably already planning a visit. Great idea. Dunedin is even better nowadays.
Dunedin Railway Station. Every city in NZ has its ups and downs. Photo / Supplied
Forsyth Barr wasn't around back then. So the 2019 version of the song might add the line "It's the covered stadium, that Sir Elton John played in". You'd want to throw an Emerson's line in too, "It's Emersons and Speights when you're drinking with your mates". Also you'd need something about the albatrosses and penguins. "It's the yellow bird that waddles.
It's those massive winged seagulls."
There's no mention of all that great Dunedin music. So maybe a line like "It's that song about smiling by the Netherworld Dancing Toys". You'd probably need to shoehorn in something about dagwood sandwiches, mutton pies, chop suey patties and cheese rolls too. "It's that stodgy food that no one eats up in the North Island". Another huge improvement in Dunedin since the 80s. The lawns at the Leith Croquet Club. What a surface. Hardly any moss at all. Beautiful.
Some things have changed in Dunedin but many remain the same. The university is by far the best and most fun in the country. It's still got flair and avant-garde all over the shop. There are still loads of drunk people buying food at 1am.
In the updated version you might cut the paperboy from the video. Our favourite lower South Island city has had a complex relationship with paper runs since the mid-90s.
Every city in New Zealand has its ups and downs. Dunedin is going through a bit of a gradient related rough patch at the moment.
So grab some revenge Whittaker's, a delicious Emerson's Pilsner. Search for Dunedin — It's All Right Here, learn it and sing it loud. Sing it so loud those evil cheating Welsh bastards hear it, freak out, back down and give our steepest street title back.
