Dancing queen at a mouse-click

PAULA OLIVER discovers her dream bar and disco. It's not real, but you can't have everything.

It was like a fantasy come true - I could design my look before I entered the bar. Blond or brunette? Short skirt or long? Ample chest or flat?

It was all fine until I walked into the bar and realised most people spoke only Finnish, including the barmaid, and I fell over the chair I was trying to sit on.

But it didn't matter, because I was in an internet chat room and nobody knew who I was. Anyone thinking, "oh no, not another chat room," pause for a minute, because this one is cool and different. And remember, I hate chat rooms too.

When you enter Finnish site Mobilesdisco, you become a 1cm-tall person in a room that resembles a typical bar.

Design your outfit and body shape before you enter. You can even change sex or become African-American if you want. All you need to do is download the free Shockwave 8 software, which can take up to 20 minutes, depending on your computer's speed.

Inside, lowly hung lights cast a shadow across the bar room, and you can confidently stride up to a group of old soaks knowing that they have no idea who you are. You can read other people's conversations as they pop up on the screen, even if some of them are in Finnish.

But here's the coolest part. You can dance.

Hidden off the side of the bar are stairs, and when you go down them you find yourself in a club atmosphere, with dark lighting, a stage and a few keen groovers on the floor.

Hitting the dance button transforms your online persona into a strange mixture of arm waving and head shaking that thankfully is mimicked by everyone else.

It's fun, but there are a few things that disco virgins like myself can trip up on. Literally.

My first attempts to buy a drink from the bar were fruitless - the barmaid spoke Finnish and I didn't. So I headed to a table, tried to sit down, and ended up asking if anyone spoke English. One did, so we struck up a conversation about how nice it is in Chicago at this time of year. Strangely enough, it was the first time "Aisha" had been in the bar too, and when I decided to exit the numbing conversation she followed me. Everywhere.

Before you enter the bar you have to reveal something about yourself that others can see. I clicked on another bar-goer to discover he was called Fungle, and liked bananas. Indiebeast, on the other hand, preferred Vodka, while Scottish Leigh was secretive, revealing only her nationality.

It's not easy to navigate your way around when you first enter, and my first stumbling efforts saw me rudely walk into people, away from others when they were speaking to me, and shouting at the top of my voice instead of talking.

It's important to remember that others might take it seriously - I saw a guy sit down next to a girl and offer to buy her a drink. He then went to the bar and came back with her gin.

But overall, it's a lot of fun, for at least half an hour. After that the only thing that's new is the dialogue, and that certainly isn't the best. But then, it isn't in a real bar.

Links


Mobilesdisco