Cocaine, Dan Evans said on Friday, is a "life-ruiner". And Evans should know. Formerly the British No. 2 and world No. 41, he tested positive for the drug a year ago. Now, instead of sharing a locker-room with Novak Djokovic and Rafael Nadal, he finds himself relying on wildcards to enter even the most humble tournaments.
At a public sports centre in Glasgow, Evans spoke for the first time today about his 12-month doping ban. His voice cracked from time to time with emotion as he relived this dark period. But at least the waiting is over, and this weekend he will be able to return to the court. Only time will tell how deeply his career has been scarred.
"It's a shocking drug," said Evans, when asked about the circumstances of his positive test. "And not just in sport, it's just terrible in life, it's a life-ruiner. If you saw the ruins it left behind, just failing a drugs test, never mind what it does to people, you'd be pretty confident I won't take that drug again.
"It's the worst thing I've ever done," Evans added. "It's a shocking thing to do, it's let down many people, not just that it's brought unwanted press to tennis. God knows what some of the greats of the game thought about that when that sort of thing comes into the headlines."
Until his fateful encounter with a plastic cup, Evans had never seemed to care much about his public perception. He was the lovable scamp of British tennis, as roguish as Kyle Edmund is squeaky clean. But his Jack-the-lad lifestyle caught up with him during a routine test in Barcelona last year.
The official verdict referred to a "tiny amount" of cocaine in his system. Evans's own evidence revealed that he had taken the drug while in England a few days earlier, before placing the leftover powder in his washbag.
Dan Evans shows his dejection against Kei Nishikori of Japan in their second round match during day seven of the BNP Paribas Open. Photo / Getty Images
It has been suggested that the original use took place at a wake in England, following the funeral of a friend's mother. But Evans avoided specifics on Friday. "I'm not going to go in to where it was and what happened," he said. "It wouldn't be fair on the occasion for the person who it was. It happened – it's the social world now isn't?
"A mistake's a mistake. I knew beforehand I shouldn't have [done it]. It's illegal for one, never mind being a sportsman. [But] in all honesty, if you're taking drugs you're not in the most clearest mindset. I'm not going to be answering those questions about if it was a one-off or not. I've never failed a drugs test before. I've failed one drugs test."
Evans was notified of his positive test in mid-June, as he prepared for what should have been a crack at the Fever-Tree Championships (as the tournament is now known) at Queen's Club. The terms of the ban stated that he would not even be allowed to visit a tennis centre until Feb 24 this year. His racket remained untouched at his parents' house as he went through the painful process of facing his friends and family.
Daniel Evans plays a forehand during day one of the 2017 French Open at Roland Garros. Photo / Getty Images
"It's just a terrible conversation, whoever it's with," he said. "There's so many people when you're involved in tennis who help you. It's not just the people who are at the tournaments day in, day out. There's that many people that support you, even if it's a text at the end of the match or staying up when you're playing in America and are knackered for work the next day.
"The family's the obvious one but all the other people, the embarrassment you put your girlfriend's mum [through], her parents, that's not what they want their daughter around is it? And then you've got your mum at work or my sister at work. It's not a situation I hope anyone will be in again."
Suddenly without a focus in a life that had revolved around sport, Evans found that the first few weeks were manageable. "There's a bit of a novelty in not playing tennis. You don't need to work or do anything. It's quite nice. But then it gets into the middle ground and there's a lot of dead time. I was saying to my girlfriend how long a working day actually is."
Evans was banned for 12 months following a positive drug test for cocaine. Photo / Getty Images
Having finally started practising again on Feb 24, Evans has since managed to pass the various physical tests – as well as repeated doping checks – that the Lawn Tennis Association set as conditions for his wild card into this weekend's Scotstoun Challenger. At least he looks trim, and he struck the ball well enough in a practice with world No. 476 Lloyd Glasspool.
"Nobody can sit there in that position and say 'I will be back'," said Evans, who will turn 28 next month. "If they say that they are lying to your face. I had doubts every day and I will have doubts until there are two digits [of world ranking] next to my name.
"Playing here, people won't fear me anymore. I have to earn that respect again. It's all new, isn't it? But it also feels exciting as well. You never know, I might sit here in a year or two years and it might have been a blessing in disguise to sort all my stuff out."
Evans's comeback match will be against world No 427 Ed Corrie, son of the LTA president Martin Corrie, on Saturday.
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