Supershorts: HDH common, but not found

Rooster's chairman Nick Politis said it was common for "Islanders to spike up with [human growth hormone]" and that both the club's testing and Australian Sports Anti-Doping Authority's testing throughout the year had not uncovered any questionable readings.

The naked truth

Oracle aren't flavour of the month everywhere. A San Francisco strip club, the New Century Theatre, is suing Oracle after one of its employees ran up US$33,540 ($40,688) in charges on a company credit card - and Oracle refused to pay the bill. We should note, in the interests of fairness, the employee was from Oracle the company, not Oracle Team USA, but throw enough mud ...

Poor choice of words

Said Brendan Rodgers of Liverpool's biting striker Luis Suarez's imminent return: "He's really champing at the bit to help the team."

Poor choice of 140 characters

@TerrellePryor: "Sorry about the loss RaiderNation. I don't remember much! Good hit by whoever it was. I heard our team fought well ... We will be back!" Yep, the whole dangers of concussion thing is really getting through to the NFL.

Drugs cock up

Italian anti-doping authorities have opened an investigation into long-distance runner Devis Licciardi after he reportedly attempted to dodge a drugs test using a fake penis. Italian media reported that Licciardi was giving a sample following the national 10K championships at Molfetta on September 21 when he was discovered trying to siphon off urine hidden in a fake penis.

Deep dish injury

From the Detroit News comes the can't-make-this-stuff-up tale of injury-prone receiver Nate Burleson. He missed 10 games last season with a broken leg and now he will have to sit out at least a few weeks this season too after breaking both bones in his left forearm in a accident. There was no alcohol involved in the crash ... but there was pizza.

PM and soccer talent scout

Former Gordon Brown spin doctor Damian McBride has written a tell-all book and one of the more surprisingly revelations was that Brown signed defender Marvin Andrews for his local soccer side Raith Rovers in a pub car park. Brown apparently had a habit of getting too involved with his local team when in Scotland. A journalist rang McBride saying that Brown had been seen discussing contract terms with Andrews in a Kirkcaldy pub car park in the middle of the night. Brown's reaction was: "Have they got photos?"

The world's plushest prisons

A World Cup stadium being built in the isolated Brazilian state of Amazonas may not become a white elephant after all. At least one judge in the area has come up with a post-World Cup use: a prisoner processing centre. Brazil is readying 12 stadiums for next year's World Cup, many of which will be little used after the tournament. Brazil is spending an estimated US$3.5 billion on stadiums for the World Cup, part of a total of $13.3 billion for related infrastructure needed to host football's biggest event. Alvaro Corado, spokesman for the Amazonas state court system, said Judge Sabino Marques proposed the novel idea. The new 44,000-seat stadium in Manaus, being built at a cost of $275 million, will host only four World Cup matches. The city of 2.3 million has no team in Brazil's first or second division, and little football tradition.

Just call me Mister Davids

Dutch legend Edgar Davids is likely to have a colourful time as player-manager north London club Barnet. The tough tackling midfielder insists his players call him Mister on the field, doesn't like travelling in a northerly direction to games and has already missed one due to a pressing engagement in Los Angeles - at the Playboy Mansion.