Supershorts: 4 March

The boys from Barca I
Over Barcelona way, they hate it when rival clubs poach their young academy players, as happened this week when Arsenal swooped for Jon Toral. "We don't like it that clubs come in with offers of money just before boys turn 16," says Barca chairman Sandro Rosell. "There are two philosophies: ours is to invest in [our academy] and the other is to fish all over Europe for kids like Arsenal do. It's legal, but a little immoral."

The boys from Barca II
So presumably it was a different FC Barcelona that signed 12-year-old Dennis Krol from Bayer Leverkusen in 2004. "We're talking about small boys," Leverkusen said at the time. "This crosses the line of all ethics and morals."

And it definitely wouldn't be the same Barca that offered the father of a 12-year-old in River Plate's youth system $265,000 annually for four years to head for Spain.

And don't mention the 6-year-old Aussie they took on trial in 2005. "Next they'll be taking toddlers," a source said.

The boys from Barca III
Better to focus on Barcelona's success stories. Such as Lionel Messi, the club waited until "The Flea" was a stately 11 years old before nabbing him from Argentinian club Newell's Old Boys and plugging him full of growth hormones.

Damn media
Rory McIlroy has taken to Twitter to express his frustration at the press for thinking he's having a go at Tiger: "Hate that the media thinks I'm taking jabs at Tiger all the time!" he tweeted.

Presumably then it was a different Rory McIlroy who wrote a piece for the Sports Illustrated Golf Plus website.

"Tiger is not playing as well as he was even a couple of years ago, never mind going back to the late 1990s and early 2000s, when he was the best. I'm not sure we are going to see him dominate again the way he did. He never seemed like he would make a mistake. It's not that he's playing badly. He's simply playing badly by Tiger's standards. He's playing like an ordinary golfer. People expect more of him because of what he has achieved."

Damn you, media, for, er, letting Rory write about Tiger.

Home advantage
If you think the vagaries of the new Super 15 schedule create some odd imbalances (the Blues don't have to face the Bulls), then cast an eye over the NRL. In a competition where travel is a killer and teams regularly drop their match after a trip to Auckland, the Rabbitohs play 19 of their 23 regular season matches in Sydney.

2011 NRL apology #1
Ah, the smell of liniment, the jovial chatter of the changing room, jumpers for goalposts, players slapping each other on the arse and the first drink-driving arrest of the year - the NRL season is nearly upon us!

Sydney Roosters playmaker Todd Carney makes the first remorseful apology of what promises to be a season chock-full of remorseful apologies.

"I understand that I've done the wrong thing once again and I've got a plan in front of me now that I can work through and it's something that I'll work hard through to get myself right."

They said it...

"I think anyone is going to struggle to beat that innings to be honest, and I'll take a few fines for that. I'll say that all night, a hundred off fifty balls in a World Cup in front of a billion people under lights against England, it doesn't get any better."

Ireland batsman Kevin O'Brien struggles and fails to contain his modesty after belting England yesterday.

"We were backs against the wall but we took a chance and we got the ball rolling, and from there I don't think England had any answers for us. They didn't really know what they were up to with their bowling plans and we took advantage of that."

... and then O'Brien has a pop at England's lacklustre bowling.

"Where are people's memories? We played two finals last year, and nobody remembers. One moment, one misguided finger and I'm gone. I am deeply sad."

Rubén Romano, coach of Mexican club side Santos, after getting the boot for giving his own fans the finger.

"At 110km an hour, it is even difficult to stay awake."

Formula One ace Fernando Alonso on plans to lower the speed on Spain's highways in an effort to conserve fuel. It's estimated the reduced speed limit will save $2.74 billion annually.

"In 18 years' time when he is giving me grief for not being there for the first six weeks, I'll be able to say: 'But I had to go and beat Holland'."

England spinner Graeme Swann on flying out to the World Cup shortly after his son's birth. Well, you won't be able to say you had to go and beat Ireland...

"I don't know why in this match we dropped catches and failed to avail run-out chances."

Pakistan captain Shahid Afridi. Ahem...

The number

1200-1
The odds on Ireland winning yesterday's World Cup match against England once skipper William Porterfield had been bowled on the first ball of the run chase by James Anderson.