KEY POINTS:
Early August is a mighty strange time to stage the 116th round of oval-ball squabbling between England and Wales - Martyn Williams, the accomplished flanker from Cardiff Blues, used the word "surreal" in describing the situation on Monday - but any notion that the audience at Twickenham this
weekend will pay good money to view a passionless outbreak of handbags at 30 paces has been firmly rejected by the travelling hordes.
Asked whether there was any such thing as a friendly game between the two countries, the Wales coach, Gareth Jenkins, felt no need to think carefully about his answer.
"Nope," he replied, immediately and with feeling.
Wales will go into the first of a quickfire batch of World Cup warm-up fixtures a little lighter on the personnel front than originally intended.
Stephen Jones, their captain, is definitely a non-starter after damaging his groin during last week's training camp in western France - "It was such an innocuous thing; he did it passing a rugby ball," Jenkins reported, resisting the temptation to suggest that no English outside-half will ever be at risk from such an injury - while Shane Williams, the left wing, is also off limits following surgery on his shoulder.
As Jenkins is considering withholding some of his fit first-choicers, including Martyn Williams, any similarity between the team taking the field on Saturday and the one on duty against Canada in Nantes on 9 September could be very coincidental indeed.
Yet Wales are distinctly chipper about winning at Twickenham for the first time in almost 20 years.
Certainly, they believe they will be more competitive than in the previous World Cup appetiser in Cardiff four years ago, when they lost 43-9 to an England side of the experimental variety.
"That was one of the low points of my career," Martyn Williams acknowledged.
"It was embarrassing then and it's embarrassing now, even though we were still going through heavy pre-tournament conditioning work when that match was played and public expectation was unrealistic.
"I'd have to say England were fitter, faster and bigger than us at that time.
"Our performances against them have been much better over the last three years, though.
"While it is always difficult to know how much to read into a game played under these circumstances, a victory at Twickenham would give us a massive boost."
With the International Rugby Board promising to act decisively against World Cup participants placing undue pressure on referees - Paddy O'Brien, the officials' co-ordinator, says he is losing patience with coaches attempting to influence events by using the media to highlight their concerns over rivals' methods and tactics - the England camp must have been highly amused to hear that Eddie Jones, the ever-talkative Australian, had put himself in the frame for a short-term post with South Africa, who play the reigning champions in a pool game of great significance on September 14.
Jones, who coached the Wallabies to the final last time out, has spent a goodly share of his career baiting the English ahead of important matches, usually by pointing the finger at alleged sharp practice.
The thought of him slipping into wind-up mode on behalf of the Springboks is intriguing.
The South Africans lost the services of their highly regarded technical expert Rassie Erasmus when the former international back-rower accepted a full-time post with Western Province.
Jones, sacked as Wallaby coach in 2005 and now working with Saracens, fancies filling the vacancy until the end of the World Cup, despite being condemned as a rugby mercenary by his own countrymen.
"My loyalty will be with the team I'm working with," he said, provocatively.
"It's the way professional coaching is these days. The game has changed."
Harlequins, who yesterday completed the signing of South Africa's second-string hooker Gary Botha, have unveiled an away strip for next season's Premiership campaign - their first change of colours since 1866.
There will be no French grey or chocolate brown, but all is not lost.
The new strip will still contain a splash of magenta.
Phew.
- INDEPENDENT
