KEY POINTS:
From the rules are made to be broken file comes this contribution: an English rugby team in retreat is a darn sight more entertaining than one going forward.
Conservative red-neckers on the front foot, they can look like swinging liberals on the back.
The 2007 World Cup finalists
roared into the new season yesterday with the vigour of an ancient lion yawning on the plains.
A World Cup "triumph" has done nothing for tired English minds and legs. Six Nations rugby is a stalemate in which a bit of chess breaks out now and then, and there is nothing as stale in all of sport than the way England plays this game.
Having built a nice first-half lead, they revealed themselves as the leaden footed bumblers we know them to be, allowing a tenacious Wales to pounce. Rugby this poor wouldn't survive in the Southern Hemisphere, so the game's two halves appear set on divergent paths.
The good news for English rugby though is that the spectators still keep turning up to watch dross in which playing for penalties is the name of the game.
Whereas the England rugby team heads towards the tryline with the verve of a tunnel digger, they can actually retreat with the sort of imagination that brought Harry Potter to life.
Changes of angles, dummy runs, sleight of hand, flick passes - the magic was all there as Brian Ashton's England hauled Wales towards victory.
One back-move looked every inch the Going brothers triple scissors trick, except it was performed in retreat which holds the benefit of allowing the ball to be dropped without the referee bringing the excitement to an end.
This was an act of such amazing generosity that after Wales were presented with a scoring chance, you wondered if Jonny Wilkinson might step up and offer to kick the goal.
Even Wilkinson, once lauded for his clinical ways, threw a critical pass so far behind his current English backline that you could imagine Dusty Hare catching it. Dusty wasn't there though, and Wales were. And they scored.
As Wales celebrated by looking stunned, England coach Ashton wandered like a dazed pensioner separated from his day-outing group.
He received a royal honour for his World Cup achievements, which confirms that the Queen doesn't watch a lot of Northern Hemisphere rugger. And who could blame her. Why watch a dog when you've got a load of corgis at home?
At the end of yesterday's match, Welsh players were hugged by coach Warren Gatland, who looked suitably awkward considering his relationship with them is barely past the introductory handshake stage.
The former Waikato man must have been doubly delighted with this good Six Nations fortune because his quest for a top job in this country was jinxed.
It was a funny old potential career path choice for Gatland. The Chiefs or the Highlanders or Wales? A load of short straws there for a man so highly regarded.
Gatland's Wales were resilient at Twickenham, and to be fair to those who profess to enjoy Northern Hemisphere rugby, it did make for a tense and exciting end if you could ignore the diabolical standard. Wales pounced with aplomb when opportunities were presented.
The Six Nations also has a historical grandeur lacking in the flighty Sanzar competitions, an impression enhanced somewhat because England still play as if they're using a leather ball and are getting paid a pound a day.
So we enter a grand new era in which another New Zealander will be paraded as the Welsh redeemer. As is the way with Welsh rugby, it will be a glorious few weeks, maybe months, before the team and the administrators get bored with doing okay and start bickering while the lack of playing talent rises back to the surface.
In terms of rescuing a sport that was mired in mediocrity at its 2007 showpiece, Twickenham showed that kick and clap is alive and well in the north, although only when the head down, bum up charge isn't being employed.
As for the great new wing recruit Lesley Vainikolo, England may put food on his table as this Pommy convert enthused last week, but he's borderline useless unless given the ball on a plate. Lesley shapes as one very dormant test rugby volcano, although he has interesting hair.
It will take more than a few law variations and a tank-like rugby league player to enhance Northern Hemisphere test rugby because it doesn't actually want to change anyway.
The Europeans might agree to the rule change which proposes doing away with corner flags. But their game will never change while the goalposts remain.
