Dylan Cleaver: Different strokes ...

The Tri Nations is New Zealand's again, but not before one of the most dramatic tests in recent history.

On a twilight stage, the match took numerous twists and turns before the All Blacks won 34-27, wrapping up the Tri Nations - the Bledisloe Cup was already safely secured - with two games to spare. The twists began even before the match with what appeared to be yet another variation of the haka.

The inflammatory final gesture of Kapa O Pango was modified, with the All Blacks dropping their thumbs a couple of centimetres and slashing across the tops of their chests rather than their necks.

However, All Black captain Richie McCaw said the All Blacks had made no decision to modify the final gesture. "Each individual is probably a little bit different, and they showed that tonight."

Before the previous trans-Tasman clash in Brisbane, Wallabies coach John Connolly suggested the final gesture was an incitement to violence, a subject he should be au fait with, given his nickname "Knuckles".

No doubt Knuckles was equally concerned with the booming explosion that followed the haka, fearful that the towering flames had the fire-starters in the crowd reaching for the Bryant & Mays. He might also want to have another look at Lote Tuqiri's insanely dangerous spear-tackle that astonishingly went unpunished by English referee Chris White - just another incident in a match that had everything and a little bit more before the All Blacks won 34-27.

The one thing missing from the match, thankfully, was gratuitous nudity, which would please the New Zealand Rugby Union no end, and one blazered official in particular. This man took it upon himself to warn the creators of sports humour (there's a word obviously in short supply at NZRU HQ) show Pulp Sport in a tersely worded email that a Tri Nations test was no place for bare bottoms.

The official, Mark Vivian, had seen a promo clip for Pulp Sport's new series in which a women's bowls tournament is interrupted by a masked streaker. From this, Vivian obviously deduced that a plan was in place to invade Eden Park. The email - cc'ed to NZRU bosses, an Eden Park official, a security official and, we kid you not, the police - read: "This morning I received the attached Super Streaker promo for the new 'Bill and Ben' series, and it did raise concern given the Bledisloe Cup match this weekend. No doubt you'll be aware of the Lisa Lewis streaking incident at the Irish Test in Hamilton, and her subsequent criminal conviction. Could you please forward this email to the Bill and Ben team, reminding them that Red Badge, Eden Park staff and the police would follow a similar course of action, with our full support ... Kind regards, Mark."

Pulp Sport's Jamie Linehan, aka Bill, was bemused when he was shown the email by TV3 bosses. "It was quite odd," Linehan told the Herald on Sunday. "But I quite like the idea the NZRU know us by our names and that we have enough influence to have them running scared. In the four years we've been going, we've never impinged on a game. All our stuff takes place on the fringes of the game, and we have never affected a match ... and wouldn't."

Lewis might permit herself a wry smile, too. The Waikato woman pocketed more than $4000 from an auction of the bikini she wore when she ran her enhanced frame on to Waikato Stadium. Crime pays. Throwing intercept passes doesn't. Neither does taking your job too seriously.