And the villain is ... Yes, it's that time of the year to dish out bouquets and brick-bats to the sporting brigade around the world. A short, sharp awards ceremony this. No nominations, no fancy dinners, no flashy little statues, no tears.
In the category of Villain of the Year,
the entire Lions tour party wins hands down. What a let down. Never have we seen so many achieve so little. Even their army of supporters were a bit of a flop although, to be fair, they didn't have that much to cheer about. And they were a nice enough bunch.
As for Sir Clive Woodward and his much- vaunted man-management, all you can say is heaven help the Southampton football club, which is where he has ended up.
The most eagerly awaited rugby tour for yonks sank in a sea of ineptitude. The All Blacks trundled past the tourists the way Michael Schumacher used to motor away from F1 opponents.
As for the Hero of the Year - try New Zealand sport in general. It was one of the greatest 12 months, although most of our elite sports people didn't face the ultimate tests provided in Olympic and World Cup years.
So read on. And if you've got a few brickbats of your own to throw after that, we're ready and waiting to duck.
HEROES
Irene Van Dyk
Dead-eye-Dyk slew the Aussies in a record triumph. The only thing she missed all year was the People's Choice sports award dinner.
Jono Gibbes
Ignored injury to inspire the Maori rugby victory over the Lions and put Woodward's massive army in retreat.
Benji Marshall
Bouncing Benji turned the NRL league grand final West Tigers' way - and turned heads with his kid-in-the-park brilliance.
Ruben Wiki
The veteran who causes fear ended up in tears, of joy. Led the historic Kiwi league campaign, and still wants more.
Caroline and Georgina Evers-Swindell
It's a stern test, picking out rowing heroes from a boat load of world champions. We'll let the turbo twins take the bow.
Roger Federer
The ace with grace. Faultless on the court, doesn't put a foot wrong off it. His beautiful game brought two more Grand Slam titles on the way to greatness.
Danica Patrick
Racing into history. Her fourth placing in the Indianapolis 500 was a race high for a woman, after she led for 19 laps. Only three other women have qualified for the 500.
The Crusaders
It's in the Deans. Another triumph meant they finished up with five of the 10 Super 12 titles.
Dan Carter
First among first five-eighths.
Michael Campbell
... Of course, after taming the US Open course at Pinehurst. The absolute shoo-in for Sportsperson of the Year. Not so sure about the shirts though.
Annika Sorenstam
Golfing superstar was fairways ahead of the rest again. Won a staggering 11 out of 21 tournaments in 2005.
Tana Umaga
A hero here for tipping over the Lions, supposedly a villain elsewhere for tipping over the Lions captain. Take your pick.
Shane Warne
You wouldn't want to live with him, but cricket won't want to live without him. A record haul of test wickets in a calendar year, breaking the Dennis Lillee mark of 85 set in 1981.
Sam Warriner
Bread winning and race winning. The Whangarei PE teacher was all class in claiming two World Cup triathlon titles.
Andrew "Freddie" Flintoff
The match winner, as English cricket rose with the Ashes.
Australian Soccer
On a roll, all the way to the World Cup finals.
George Best
Used to leave defenders grasping, but couldn't beat his demons. Sadly missed.
VILLAINS
Alastair Campbell
The Lions' spin doctor left these shores with his reputation intact.
Richie McCaw's Headaches
The worrying injury cloud is a pain in another part of the anatomy.
Daryl Tuffey
Who is not having a ball after bowling 14 of them in the first over of a one-day international. Records are made to be broken ... but Tuffey's should be safe.
Billy Bowden
The umpire's cricket Tiki Tour included souveniring the match ball after the second Ashes test.
Tana Umaga
See heroes.
Brian O'Driscoll
If you can't beat 'em, bleat.
Stadium Food and Prices
Our taste testers gave Eden Park the biggest roasting. And after scrumming for the food, you get cleaned out.
John Adshead's Knights
Kicking soccer around.
The Breakers
No hoop, hoop hooray yet.
The Melbourne Cup
Easy win hard to take. The Flemington track was heavily watered so as to assist the great Makybe Diva, who duly scored her third consecutive win.
Rupeni Caucaunibuca
Sidestepped the Fiji team again, so Fiji returned the compliment.
Vilimoni Delasau
Whacky back. Test revealed dope after Fiji were wasted by the All Blacks.
And the villain is ... Yes, it's that time of the year to dish out bouquets and brick-bats to the sporting brigade around the world. A short, sharp awards ceremony this. No nominations, no fancy dinners, no flashy little statues, no tears.
In the category of Villain of the Year,
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