The art of World Cup diving: Analysing the theatrics

Please, get this man an Oscar. Photo: photosport.nz

Steel yourself for the customary Oscar diving nominations at the football World Cup.

According to Paul Zehr, a professor for neuroscience and kinesiology at Canada's University of Victoria, we should be looking for three types: The "Platoon", The Finish Line and The Belly Flop.

The "Platoon", as per the scene with Willem Dafoe's character Sergeant Elias on his knees with arms thrust upwards in the eponymous film, is an obvious ruse when a player wants to dupe a referee into a penalty.

"The athlete throws their hands over their head and falls almost lifeless to the ground​," Zehr wrote.

The Finish Line, think Sir Peter Snell pipping Roger Moens in the 800m at the 1960 Rome Olympics, also draws attention for a whistle blast.

"The player thrusts their chest forward while yanking their arms behind them... Except this appears to be a race to unsafely crash to the ground."

The Belly Flop, as players channel Mike Myers' Fat Bastard boinging off a 3m springboard, provides another example of the genre.

"Arms are flung overhead with the body stretched out and offering no protection if the athlete lands fully on the ground in a very exposed position. Much safer in water than on land."

Zehr told the Herald his analysis is partly tongue-in-cheek, but based on real science and frustration as a football fan.

"It's an application of the other kind of research I do in my lab.

"That means trying to understand how our nervous system, like our brain and spinal cord, co-ordinates our arms and legs when we walk around so we don't trip stumble and fall.

"We're basically upright walking cats. We have all these protective reactions."

Zehr doubts FIFA will get in touch, but says we need to look at common sense and basic science to help resolve the problem.

"At the very least if we could get better education of referees to know what to look for.

"Keep your eye on the arms - that's the key. What are folks doing with their upper bodies? Is it something protective with arms in front? You don't naturally fling them in the air, to the side or behind you, because that will get you injured.

"It bothers me how some soccer players respond in contact. They're actually deliberately stopping the ancient parts of our nervous system from doing their job, and that's fascinating. They're really good at doing this. Hats off."

Zehr says the flipside is a player like Lionel Messi who gets hacked, and has people pulling on him when fouls should be called.

"People are risk averse. They don't want to make a decision that might be wrong, so that almost encourages players to be more dramatic because it's the only way referees will make big calls.

"What I'd like to see, in addition to less faking, is retroactive video-enabled suspensions for players clearly are cheating. There will always be mistakes in refereeing and it truly is hard to see some of these things when they happen at game speed.

"But if there's a crackdown that can occur later with outcomes that have real teeth, players will eventually stop doing it - or at least do it less."