Soccer: Fallen star puts his 'own goals' behind him

On or off the field, Michael Utting has always been a good story.

Sadly, his often brilliant work on it was at times overshadowed by the controversies off it. Now, looking back after announcing his retirement from international and national football, Utting says he has no regrets even if he does admit that given his time again, he would have done things differently.

Handed a second chance both at life and football after a 1995 motor accident in South Africa left him with a broken neck and smashed skull, Utting did his best to blow it.

He fought back to reclaim the All Whites goalkeeping shirt and then did all he could to throw it away.

Few in Guadalajara for the 1999 Confederations Cup were aware of the battle Utting was waging with the bottle.

The focus for those in Mexico was, initially, more on his deeds on the pitch, which won him plaudits as man of the match for his work against the United States. Scouts from Spanish and British clubs were scurrying, but not for long.

A binge after that game and the breaking of a midnight curfew forced coach Ken Dugdale's hand. He dropped Utting for the second match against Germany.

At the time of that incident, Dugdale won full support for his stance.

Later, the former All Whites coach said he thought it was simply an isolated incident.

"But if I knew then what I know now, I would have sat him down for a chat. I didn't realise he was on his way to becoming an alcoholic," Dugdale said last year.

It was not the end of the sorry tale.

In 2002, Utting was back in New Zealand and set to star for the All Whites in the Oceania Nations Cup.

He never got to play. Another battle with the bottle and a subsequent ruckus at the team hotel left coach Mick Waitt with no option but to kick his goalkeeper out.

"If I hadn't been booted out of the squad, I probably would have gone back to South Africa, got on the piss, and killed myself," Utting said in an interview before last September's television documentary, One For The Road.

"Mick Waitt did me the biggest favour of my life."

It was for Utting the first day of the rest of his life.

Determined to make the most of his undoubted talents, he kicked the whisky, cognac and all other bottles into touch and set out to show he could channel those talents in the right direction.

While his best days between the posts might have been behind him, Utting wanted to prove otherwise.

He looked outside the game that had brought him glory in New Zealand, South Africa and at some of the world's biggest football grounds.

He had long craved stability.

He reckons he has now found it.

With support from people such as Jeff Strom, Rex Dawkins and many others, including the coaching staff at Waikato FC, Utting has vowed his life will continue on the straight and narrow.

It is a far cry from his very early days when he kicked a ball around on muddy Wellington fields.

"I loved my time in football," Utting said this week in announcing his decision to confine any future involvement to perhaps a season or two in the local leagues.

"I'm not sad about leaving.

"Alcohol was controlling my life. While I thoroughly enjoyed it at the time, I realise now it took me away from where I was. I had my highs and lows.

"Alcohol allowed me to maintain my high. No more.

"It is now 32 months and 19 days since my last drink. I will never drink again.

"I look at what life has given me now. It has opened a lot of doors.

"A lot of people get into professional sport and that's all they can do. I want more from life."

A new job, a steady relationship with Mary-Jane Richards, a nice house (with the obligatory mortgage) and, if he wants it, the chance to still have a kickaround have brought the contentment back to Utting's life.

"I'm very fortunate," he said.

"I'm getting out now while people recognise what I did.

"Since I decided to call it quits, I have been overwhelmed by the support and the number of people who would like me to either play or do some coaching for them.

"I'm a bit of a character. I have always enjoyed the camaraderie football has given me. That won't change."

That's for sure.