Traditions rule Derby Day: women pin fascinators into new 'dos and shimmy into black-and-white dresses.
The purse-lipped Victoria Racing Club banned bare midriffs this year; it might as well not have bothered. Boisterous winds meant the fashionable look was one hand protecting the plastic champagne flute and the other protecting modesty, but there was still more lingerie on show than at an Elle Macpherson parade.
For men, suits and ties: yes, ties, unseen Downunder since the '90s. Of course, this was the public lawn. Dress standards in the exclusive lounges are far more formal.
The big names (apart from the horses, occasionally observed galloping around the outskirts) were Chris Hemsworth, Aussie actor-turned-Hollywood superhero, and Solange Knowles, who lived up to big sister Beyonce's diva standards by arriving four hours late for her gig.
They came by helicopter, boats and trains. On my river cruise to the course, a woman pulled out an envelope and counted several hundred notes - the pool which her small office in the city had asked her to punt on Derby Day. There'll be another envelope-full this afternoon.
The city, which modestly bills itself "the sporting capital of the world", never lets a chance go by. Its two A-league soccer teams had home games on Friday and Monday nights; on Sunday, the small matter of a crucial Four Nations league test between the Kangaroos and England at AAMI Park.
The locals, rather fewer than Australian officials had hoped for, reached for cans of VB and gulped sighs of relief when a couple of hometown decisions saw their team get home, even more when their flaky hero Cameron Smith stole the Man of the Match award from Warriors fullback Sam Tompkins' impression of Admiral Nelson holding back the invading fleet on his own.
And on Thursday, just in case anyone thinks it's time for a rest and a lie-down, there's Twenty20 cricket between South Africa and Australia at the MCG. The wham-bam form of the game is generally called "the Big Bash" on this side of the Tasman; given the home team's performances against Pakistan and the Proteas' top world ranking, locals feel that might be especially apt.
There's also a three-day international video game event at the riverbank convention centre, though the crowd seemed bemused at the reality of sport with live people and animals in surrounding streets and preferred to spend most of the weekend indoors.
Yesterday, the race that is said to stop two nations stopped the centre of its hometown in its tram tracks for four hours, for the annual Cup parade.
Somewhere in its midst were the five women from Taranaki on my flight across the Ditch who'd left their husbands and children and cows and come to Melbourne for a four-day girls' weekend.
As we waited to leave the plane, they told me it was a once-in-a-lifetime trip. For Melburnians, it's the first Tuesday of every November.
Forging for cause
Decades of working with horses were the only guide for one farrier who has forged a 315kg horseshoe statue to raise money for the terminal disease that has struck a fellow farrier.
Taranaki man and farrier of 40 years Ray Lee spent almost 300 hours building the horseshoe sculpture that will be on display at Ellerslie Racecourse today.
Mr Lee, 63, built the statue after learning his friend David McGuire, 60, had been diagnosed with terminal skin cancer.
"There was no drawings or anything - it was all done by the feel and the fact I have been working with horses for more than 54 years - I learned to weld along the way," said Mr Lee.
The pair completed their apprenticeships together in Te Awamutu in 1969 and 1970.
The statue, Attitude Adjuster, will be auctioned at a Cancer Society event in December.
• Donations can be made at Ellerslie today, or online at givealittle.co.nz/org/tarcansoc
Ewan McDonald is visiting the Melbourne Spring Carnival with the assistance of Tourism Victoria.
