Dylan Cleaver: G mate, our cups are over-flowing

Baz and Clarkey have drawn the battle lines. Photo / Getty Images

Kia Ora - just to avoid confusion, that's a common greeting on this side of the Tasman, not a Korean car manufacturer that sponsors that tennis tournament you fullas host but never win.

When was it again, 1976? With that Edmondson bloke who looked like a barman who fell into a pair of Stubbies.

Bit of a cheap shot, I know. Tennis is not really a sport, is it? And we know how hard it can be hosting a proper event, like rugby.

I haven't got the figures at hand, but a mate told me we've hosted the RWC twice.

Once you guys even let us host it on our own, and he reckons we did OK.

We were meant to co-host in 2003 as well, but our Anzac 'mates' shafted us on that, pulling a reverse ambush Sun Tzu would have been proud of. Just a shame it was Martin Johnson (married to a good Kiwi lass) holding the trophy aloft at Homebush that night.

But I continue to digress. The subject is crucket, of course.

May I be the first to congratulate Australia on making the final, once and for all erasing the memories of 1992.

That semifinal victory against India on Thursday was truly ... riveting. If there had been more than one Australian to 10 Indians in the crowd I'm sure there would have been, you know, a few signs of life in the place.

To tell you the truth, it was a godsend having a quiet night.

Things got a bit rowdy here at Eden Park on Tuesday.

Grant Elliott, the Hairy Javelin, hit a six to win off the penultimate ball. The crowd went nuts. People looked like they cared.

It's not the first time one of our blokes hit a six at Eden Park to win a match at this World Cup. It happened also on February 28, but I can't remember who against. When you go through your pool unbeaten, all the losers tend to blur into one.

But we can't afford to be smug, not when you've got players like Clarkey, Starcy, Finchy, Mitch and Watto lined up against you.

Our heroes, like Two-Toes, Baz, the Javelin, Wonky Donkey and the Blind Italian Librarian are going to have to be at their best to beat them.

Also working in your favour is that the game is being played at the MCG, or the "G" for those rendered genetically incapable of remembering three letters.

Matthew Hayden reckons it's too big for our boys. Our boys reckon it might be just big enough to contain his ego.

The MCG's so big, you couldn't possibly girt it by sea.

It's so big, fielders at fine leg are in a different time zone to those at long on. It's so big it might just have room to house our Rugby World Cup, Rugby Championship trophy, Four Nations league trophy, Bledisloe Cup, Australian NBL trophy, Chappell-Hadlee trophy and, yes, the Cricket World Cup.