Chris Cairns: Tough start but we still have belief

We can look at our top order and say there are some issues there but sometimes you just have to give a guy his due and yesterday Brett Lee played an outstanding game for Australia.

At halftime, we felt confident about chasing 252 but we were undone by some quality fast bowling from Lee, who loves Eden Park. He was quick, he was deadly and, above all, he picked up wickets.

We need to turn things around pretty quickly and a big focus will be on trying to get through the first 10 overs of our innings without too much damage. Beyond Lee, there's quite a bit of inexperience in the Australian bowling line-up and it's something we need to exploit if we are to compete.

While Lee might not always pick up wickets, he creates opportunities at the other end and it was Nathan Bracken and Stuart Clark who profited last night. They both put the ball in the right zones as we tried to dig ourselves out of a hole but, in the end, we tried to force the issue too much.

To lose Stephen Fleming is one thing but to also lose Shane Bond on the eve of the match was a big blow for us. We can cope with one but to lose two players of such quality is a big ask and I really felt for Bondy because he's had a tough run of injuries and just wants to play in front of his home crowd for a change.

I felt quite anxious about coming back into the Black Caps after being dropped for the South African series but I've always had a saying: Respect is not something you earn and keep, it's something you keep earning. I don't have a right to a spot any more than the next guy and have to continue to deliver and develop as a player.

I had a chuckle to myself, though, when Daniel Vettori handed me the ball for my first over because last week I was playing club cricket against Marist and I found it amusing to be up against Australia.

I felt pretty good out there. My rhythm was good, I felt stronger than I have for a while but I don't really think my figures reflected that. That's cricket, though.

At one stage we were staring at chasing 300 as Ricky Ponting and Simon Katich rumbled along nicely but Vettori showed what a world-class bowler he is and Kyle Mills in particular did well to restrict them to a gettable total.

It was nice to get some runs as my batting is something I have been working on a lot. I was reckless and realised I needed to work on my defence. After all, it's about spending time in the middle because you can't score runs if you're not out there.

Along with working on my fitness, that has been my biggest focus in recent weeks. Although yesterday was a tough day at the office, a very tough day, we believe we can turn things around and we believe in each other.

But we will have to dig deep.