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Home / Sport

Cricket: England's squad against New Zealand labelled a joke

By Tyson Otto
news.com.au·
11 Jan, 2018 05:43 AM4 mins to read

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The sporting entity that wrote the book on losing ugly has outdone itself yet again. Photo / AP

The sporting entity that wrote the book on losing ugly has outdone itself yet again. Photo / AP

Only England Cricket could find a way to make their Ashes humiliation worse.

The sporting entity that wrote the book on losing ugly has outdone itself yet again — producing a new way to turn defeat into a dramatic novel of self destruction.

The England Cricket Board on Thursday morning announced its squad for its Test series against New Zealand in March — and it's seen them labelled a laughing stock. Again.

England selectors have taken a hatchet to the squad that surrendered the Ashes 4-0 in Australia — and their selections have gone down like a lead balloon.

England cricketer Ben Stokes. Photo / AP
England cricketer Ben Stokes. Photo / AP
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The 16-man squad includes Ben Stokes, uncapped Lancashire batsman Liam Livingstone and returning paceman Mark Wood for the two-match Test series.

Ashes failures James Vince and Mark Stoneman have also held their spots in the squad, while Ashes sacrificial lambs Jake Ball (who played in the Brisbane Test) and Tom Curran (who played in Melbourne and Sydney) have been torn apart and spat back out of the England Test unit.

The most perplexing axing was out-of-favour batsman Gary Ballance, who didn't get selected in the entire Ashes series.

Now, he's been dropped without firing a shot for the New Zealand series.

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The bizarre shake-up was mercilessly mocked by cricket commentators.

Aussie Test great Dean Jones led the firing squad, labelling the squad announcement "hilarious".

"It does seem remarkable that despite their repeated collective failure in the Ashes, England's top and middle order are set to remain unchanged" @Aggerscricket on the NZ Test squad.

.#bbccricket pic.twitter.com/Ne725yIe6w

— Test Match Special (@bbctms) January 10, 2018

That’s hilarious... Gary Balance didn’t even play a bloody game!! So it’s his fault.. too funny. https://t.co/5LKH1fHlBd

— Dean Jones AM (@ProfDeano) January 10, 2018

What was the point in taking Ballance to Aus and then dropping him? 🤔 Stoneman looks class at times but is Vince the answer? (His classy drive aside)

— Danny Hall (@dannyhall04) January 10, 2018

Coach Trevor Bayliss made a strong case for the retention of Stoneman and Vince when reviewing the campaign earlier this week, but the pair underperformed against Australia and there is little doubt that this show of faith requires immediate payback if they are to remain in the side.

England play two warm-up matches in Hamilton before their gruelling winter schedule finally comes to a close with Tests in Auckland on March 22 and Christchurch on March 30.

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Livingstone, 24, is the spare batsman on tour and will likely push harder for a place than Ballance, who resembled little more than a place holder during the Ashes.

"Liam has been a player that we have been impressed with for quite some time, having performed well in the county system with Lancashire and over the past couple of years with the England Lions," England selector James Whitaker said.

Joe Root is driving England's blunder bus. Photo / AAP
Joe Root is driving England's blunder bus. Photo / AAP

"He is a very talented and tough cricketer who has the ideal qualities and character to be successful in the Test arena. During the recent Lions tour of Australia, he was a standout performer and showed a lot of maturity in his attitude and put in some strong performances." Wood, meanwhile, would have been present for the Test leg in Australia had he been considered fit and robust enough for the challenge.

He is currently with England's limited-overs squad as they look to exact a measure of revenge for the Ashes.

As has been the case with the past three squad announcements, all-rounder Stokes appears with a caveat next to his name, as he waits to find out if he will be charged by the Crown Prosecution Service.

Stokes missed the entire series in Australia after being banned from international duties while police investigate his alleged role in a fight outside a nightclub in Bristol three months ago.

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He kept his hand in by playing for Canterbury, his New Zealand birth province, for a month, but has since returned home to be with his wife and young family.

England selectors said he was in the frame "though his involvement remains subject to any relevant legal or disciplinary developments in relation to the incident in Bristol in September"

ENGLAND SQUAD: Joe Root (c), Moeen Ali, James Anderson, Jonny Bairstow, Stuart Broad, Alastair Cook, Mason Crane, Ben Foakes, Liam Livingstone, Dawid Malan, Craig Overton, Ben Stokes, Mark Stoneman, James Vince, Chris Woakes, Mark Wood.

— with AAP

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