Andrew Johnston plays a shot during the US Open. Photo / Getty Images
If Phil Mickelson wasn't already a legend among golf fans, surely he is now.
The American had his worst round of the US Open overnight, finishing his third round with an 11-over 81 – thanks to a 10 on the par-4 13th which included a two-shot penalty for not-so-subtly breaking the rules.
Trying to secure bogey, Mickelson putted past the hole. But rather than waiting for it to stop before playing another shot, the 48-year-old ran to cut off the ball, playing another shot before it had stopped moving.
VIDEO: Cheatin' Phil Mickelson is melting down at the U.S. Open https://t.co/6aymkGvaye pic.twitter.com/CGdcEj6R70
— Deadspin (@Deadspin) June 16, 2018
Now, you don't want to see every professional sportsperson bending and ignoring the rules, but the blatant way Mickelson went about it was simply brilliant.
Asked about it afterwards, he told Fox he had weighted up the cost before making the decision.
"I don't meant it in any disrespect and if that's the way people took it then I apologise to them. I took the two-shot penalty and moved on, there's not much more to say.
"In that situation I was just going back and forth and I would gladly take the two shots over continuing that display."
Sure, the man known as Lefty is a professional and should be held to a higher standard. But let's be honest – we're all guilty of bending the rules from time to time when we're out competing.
At risk of outing myself as a perennial cheat, here's a list of ways you too can improve your performance.
Golf
'Forgetting' how many shots you've taken on a hole: A favourite among social golfers, especially in the late stages of a round. To get your score looking slightly more respectable, try knocking a couple of shot off your score on a hole if it begins to get too high. Make sure you give yourself a believable score though. There's also the options of not counting drops and, to a more extreme level, counting every second shot. The latter should be reserved for dire situations.
Moving your ball slightly for a better lie: If you're a social golfer, you can't tell me you've never done this. No one wants to try digging their ball out of heavy rough after spraying one off the tee. Solution – pick your ball up and place it in such a way that you can get the face of the club on the ball and pull of that much needed recovery shot.
The hunt for a ball in your pocket: Losing a ball is never good for your round. 1. It adds unwanted shots. 2. Your ball supply is limited. So, when you've clipped one into the bushes, grabbing another ball from your bag and saying "I'll take another one with me in case I can't find it" before hunting is a good way to at least save your score. Simply look around for a bit before casually slipping the replacement ball out of your pocket and proclaiming you've found your initial one.
A practice tee off on the first hole: I've lost many a golf ball on the daunting first tee at Inglewood Golf Course in Taranaki. A long par 5 next to the road, with farmland on the other side, pulling your tee shot left usually mean you're sending your ball into a paddock. It's okay though, usually agreed upon beforehand, the first shot 'practice' is a good way to free your driverand see how it goes, before playing a smart 'actual' shot.
Basketball
Being the "foul" guy: I can honestly say this is something I've never been guilty of, but I've played pickup basketball with plenty of delicate little snowflakes. At the slightest bit of contact, they're known to flail their ams up, fling the ball in the general vicinity of the basket and yell that dreaded four letter F-word to milk free throws. Don't be that guy.
Claiming a three on a long range jumper / claiming a toe on the line when your opponent hits a three: Can be used on offence and defence – who doesn't love an adapatable advantage? Again, remaining adamant in your call is the key to this one. A bit trickier to sell on the offensive end, the best point of argument is you began your shot beyond the arc and jumped forward – landing inside the line.
Throwing out your hips/arms/legs while screnning / the hug-screen: Depending on who you're playing against, the hug screen may not be an option. Reserve it for when you're playing against friends – I imagine most people don't like being hugged by strangers at a pickup basketball game. If you've set a screen but it's not quite in the right place, a hip check can be effective, as can widening your stance at the last moment or sticking your elbows out. Most people won't call a foul on this, so it's a pretty reliable one for freeing up your team mate.
Cricket
The unspoken 'rule' that you do not give your own team mate out LBW: Anyone who's ever played social grade cricket is guilty of this one. If you've never umpired before but get sent out to the middle, the first thing a team mate will tell you is "just don't give anyone LBW and you'll be fine."
"I'd walk if I'd hit it.": A classic when you're building a solid inning but a caught behind from an paper thin edge. You can claim you flicked your handle grip, clipped your pads or, if it wasn't audible, you can get away with denying any contact at all. This is a classic in backyard cricket too, where automatic wicketkeeper never drops anything.
'Saving' a boundary after it's crossed the mark: With the boundary line a mown stirp, gerenally marked by spaced out pegs, if you're able to get to the ball just after it crossed the boundary, you can get away with putting in the effort to reach the ball, and ripping it back in. An ability to sell comes in very handy here.
Touch
Denying a faint touch: Another all-time classic. The defender's word against an attacking player who just broke the line and/or scored a try. It has been known to turn the game a bit sour, depending on how close it is.
'Losing' the count: Nothing wrong with sneaking an extra touch or four into your set.
Obstruction (also works for rugby/league/squash): If you know you're not going to get to a player, simplay run into one of their team mates in your proximity. You can then claim you would have got there if the person you ran into wasn't in the way. Remaining adamant in your call is the key to this one.
Tennis
The ace fault: Calling a fault on a wide serve that clips the corner of the box. Simple, but effective.
Calling out on a shot that totally wasn't out: If the ball hits the baseline, it's in folks. But, the good thing about the human eye is while your opponent can see the baseline, they're not in a position to be certain of whether or not the ball was in fact in. Use that to your advantage. It can also be used if your shank your return on a deep shot.
Mark Walter, already a minority owner, will buy the controlling interest.