Over the summer Chronicle reporters have been trying their hand at something new, under the supervision of experts. Today Mike Tweed takes singing lessons.
As a member of Whanganui rock ‘n’ roll exports The Have (later Sun and the Wolf), I have sat behind a drum kit for most of my adult life.
Lurking at the back of the stage, in the shadows, bereft of any limelight, I hammered away across decades and continents.
Was I ever offered a microphone? No way, nor did I have the chance to sing on any of our records.
Now, I’ve always thought I had a lovely singing voice and my mother agrees, but it was time to seek out the opinion of a trained professional.
That was singing coach and leader of the Flow Collective, Elizabeth de Vegt.
De Vegt, a longtime music lecturer at UCOL with a Masters in music, set up a studio on Guyton St to teach students of all ages.
She was, I thought, about to be blown away by my talent.
A couple of days before my lesson, de Vegt suggested I pick a song for us to work on.
I went with Faith No More’s version of This Guy’s in Love with You by Burt Bacharach and Hal David - a karaoke staple for years, a tried-and-true.
Singing it without the help of liquid courage proved to be a much different proposition.
First up came a series of breathing exercises - uncharted territory.
“One bugbear of mine and something I try and train my students out of is having constriction when they’re breathing in,” de Vegt said.
“Everything is really tense so try and breathe with a big, open throat.
“You’re still being quite noisy. That will overload your vocal folds [cords]. Try and be low and slow.”
De Vegt said one exercise she got all her students to do regardless age was taking the “ng” from the word “sing” and’ “sirening it” low and high to explore their range.
“Sirening is a really good way to check in with your voice and see how it’s functioning,” she said.
“The other [exercise] I do is making a horse noise, then putting a hum behind it, then sirening that.
“You need to be really relaxed otherwise your lips stop flapping.”
My lips rarely stop flapping in any situation so as far as I could tell, my horse noises were spot on.
After taking my voice through a few scales, Elizabeth designated me with a range of just over three octaves - from a D2 to an E5.
“You’ve obviously got a really good, functioning larynx,” de Vegt said.
That range put me in the same league as Harry Nielson, Kate Bush and Bjork.
A quick internet search revealed the larynx - voice box - was a hollow tube about four to five centimetres in length and width that lets air pass from the throat to the trachea on the way to the lungs.
I didn’t bother finding out what a trachea was but it turned out Mike Patton from Faith No More had a six-octave range.
In the cold light of day and outside a karaoke booth, Patton’s chorus in This Guy’s in Love with You was out of reach for this lowly (sober) drummer.
I reverted to the original - sung in 1968 by a trumpet player called Herb Alpert.
Before it was show time, however, I was instructed to talk like a chipmunk and then like Santa Claus to get my larynx moving, with more scale work to follow.
Things were warming up nicely, although de Vegt pulled me up for physically ducking when going for low notes.
“Keep your head up nice and straight, with a nice posture. Use your ballet posture.”
The time had come to put my singing voice where my mouth was.
My first run-through was accompanied by wild hand gestures, poses and plenty of emotion, and I managed to nail most of it - or so I thought.
“We can probably work on some of those higher notes,” de Vegt said.
“Take away some of the stylistic performance-type things and just sing straight through the notes.”
I was still too “breathy” so I sang using only “na na nas” to help with the closure of my vocal folds.
Full renditions followed and with Elizabeth’s guidance, I was back on track and mostly in key.
I had discovered there was more to this singing business than just belting out Bacharach willy-nilly.
It was time for her assessment. Had my bandmates missed a trick all those years ago?
“You’ve got really good pitching and feel, good timing. I think you have the makings to be a great singer,” de Vegt said.
“It’s just a matter of harnessing your power and using it.”
My mother had been vindicated.
De Vegt said she had singing students aged between 6 and 60.
“It can be trickier than just plonking a piano key. You’re training up tiny muscles to do what you want them to do.
“Wherever you’re at today - good voice day or bad voice day - I’m trying to move you along just a little bit more.
“Then, you can walk away thinking ‘Huh, there’s something new functioning that wasn’t there before’.”
Elizabeth de Vegt’s Love Singing with Lizzie studio is at 89A Guyton St.
For more information, text 022 644 9020 or email elizabeth.devegt@gmail.com.
Image 1 of 9: Summer Series. I am new to this. Reporter Michael Tweed has a go at learning to sing. Photo / Bevan Conley
Mike Tweed is an assistant news director and multimedia journalist at the Whanganui Chronicle. Since starting in March 2020, he has dabbled in everything from sport to music. At present his focus is local government, primarily the Whanganui District Council.