The past week has brought tears of joy and disbelief for Hawkins after moving into a permanent home in Tātau Tātau o Te Wairoa’s Te Rauā residential development.
“We now have something we haven’t had in a very long time, a home.
“A warm, safe, stable whare,” Hawkins said.
There are 43 affordable rentals in the development.
Occupants face a robust selection process to prove hardship, reliability and the ability to pay their bills.
Nine of the homes are now occupied.
Hawkins says she can’t help but feel guilty.
“There are so many people in similar situations to mine. People living in sheds. I feel guilty that people are hearing my story.
“I know what it feels like to have no place to belong, everything starts to shift. Your footing feels unsure. For us, the first thing to go was our health, physically, mentally, and emotionally.
“But now, everything has changed. We’re home. And because we have this foundation, we can look forward. We can rest, heal, rebuild and dream again.
“For me, it means picking up where I left off, back in Wairoa, continuing the journey I began years ago. From night shifts at Affco to full-time study.”
On the morning of the cyclone, she remembered thinking about 8am that, after all the hype, nothing had happened.
“My mum, who is profoundly deaf, was living with me at the time. I was writing her a note to say, ‘see I told you nothing would happen,’ when suddenly I saw all this water coming down the street.
“The water went through our house. We managed to save a few things, but the reason we had to leave was because we lived next door to a panel beaters and toxic chemicals washed through our home and it wasn’t safe to stay.”
Hawkins said education had changed her life.
“After working at Affco for three years, I decided I needed to do something. I did okay at school, so I started studying during the day and worked at night.”
She has completed 12 qualifications “right here in Wairoa” and is now in the final stage of her Doctorate in Professional Practice, focused on how education can transform individuals and communities.
Her first paid job was teaching intensive literacy and numeracy in prisons.
She has begun writing a children’s book, which she hopes will become a series.
“We are not just thankful to be back in Wairoa, we are transformed by the gift of returning.
“We carry our gratitude in everything we do next.”
LDR is local body journalism co-funded by RNZ and NZ On Air.