KEY POINTS:
Christmas is surrounded by myths. We'll just confine ourselves with debunking one here today: that fake trees are a more ecologically sound totem of the festive season than their real, spruce, counterparts.
We can see why it arose in the first place. The real Christmas tree has had
rotten environmental press: badly grown, in a monoculture that leaches all nutrients from the soil.
Some growers have resorted to using pesticides and, apparently, even colourants, to spruce up firs ready for the small window of sales opportunity.
Against this backdrop - and the fact that eight million trees are chopped down in Britain alone each year and propped up in a bucket for just two weeks - the plastic, reusable version begins to look superior.
And its reusability might win the day, were it not for the fact that most are used just two or three years in succession before being cast out with the festive rubbish.
Unlike their real competitors, which should be recycled, plastic trees - originally, let's remember, made and shipped from the Far East, predominantly China - only have one final resting place: landfills, where they will take hundreds of years to degrade.
On the matter of the real thing, check if your local council is running a post-Christmas collection and recycling service.
Meanwhile, half a hectare of Christmas trees will produce enough oxygen for 16 people to live on for a year in the time before they are cut.
But you do need to get the right one. In the absence of shopping for yours with an agronomist or natural resources expert, go for as local a tree grower as possible.
Luckily, trees are very much a product of their environment: the good-looking tall ones tend to be grown properly on good soil with plenty of space between them.
Real Christmas trees are also said to absorb 5 million tonnes of carbon dioxide every year, which technically should make them carbon neutral. If you buy one with roots and re-plant, then this will definitely get you way ahead in the environment stakes.
But do re-potted trees really survive? Industry insiders recommend you find a tree with a good root ball in the first place. The tree must also be given adequate space in the garden, and most die in the summer because people forget to water them.
In which case, let's reconvene in August just to see how many have actually managed to survive.
Until then, install your well-reared real tree and deck it out with festive abandon.
Well, almost - remember, LED lights use nine times less energy than their conventional counterparts.
- Observer