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Home / New Zealand

The good oil: Election 08 bumper stickers

NZ Herald
12 Sep, 2008 04:00 PM4 mins to read

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KEY POINTS:

A couple of larrikin artists are toying with words and illustrations for Election '08 bumper stickers and posters. One carries a picture of Helen Clark and Winston Peters under the headline: "The Shaming of the Shrew". Another has the headline "Karaka Yearling/Shearling Sales" and shows Peters and Clark as wizened knackers in the auction ring. Peters is whispering "Neigh-boors" in Clark's ear. Those in the stands are voters tagged "Shearlings". A shearling, of course, is a sheep shorn of its wool for the first time. There's one of Energy Minister David Parker doing high-fives with Clark and Finance Minister Michael Cullen over the Emissions Trading Scheme. The caption reads: "ETS - Electoral Trading Scam". One with National Party leader John Key says: "Keyp the Key Hidden". Yet another shows Act leader leader Rodney Hide peering over Peters' shoulder. The caption reads "Hide and Sneak".

* * *

The wealthy Aucklander who is selling up and moving to Australia has apparently sold his vintage Ford but still has the early BMW motorbike. He emailed friends to say MMP had "corrupted" this country forever. He's still working the computer keyboard. His latest email says, in part: "The vulgar people in Parliament have moved New Zealand away from its storied historic roots into a lawless, middle-Pacific no-man's land, where tribal rivalry corrupts legislation and short utterances studded with four-letter words creep into the language. There's an alarming new ignorance in this country." He might be right. A female broadcaster on Newstalk ZB described Thursday morning's weather as "crap".

* * *

The upcoming new season of motoring TV show Top Gear shows a V8-powered BMW M3 coupe following a petrol-electric Toyota Prius sedan at speed around a race track. Why? To find which car uses the least amount of fuel over 10 laps. The Stig gives the 1.5-litre Prius some stick while host Jeremy Clarkson nonchalantly trails close behind in the 4-litre BMW. No brainer? Not quite. The BMW recorded 19mpg and the Prius 17mpg, or 14.8 litres/100km against 16.6 litres/100km. The Prius' smaller engine had to work harder, burdened also by the weight of its battery pack. As Clarkson said: "It's not what you drive, it's how you drive it."

* * *

Automotive advertising in the United States is headed for its lowest level in nine years, as carmakers and dealers move to cut expenses in a soft market. The industry will spend about US$15 billion ($23 billion) to advertise in US media in 2008, down 16 per cent from 2007 and the lowest total since 1999, says Wall Street research firm Sanford C. Bernstein & Co. It says automotive advertisers will spend an average of US$1057 for every new vehicle sold in 2008, down 19 per cent from the peak in 2004.

* * *

Towbin Hummer was not only the biggest Hummer dealer in flashy Las Vegas, but one of the biggest in the US. That was before US$4 a gallon petrol and flagging SUV sales. Now it's closed, the eighth Hummer dealer in the US to shut down this year. Said owner Dan Towbin: "When you stake your claim on being the biggest and the baddest, and Vegas rejects you, you've probably hit the end of the line."

* * *

Willie Vickers, 46, was arrested in Ohio on old burglary warrants after he helped a woman and a policeman get into her locked car. Vickers opened it in seconds, leading the cop to run his name through the wanted file. Rising prices for scrap metal led to the arrest of a man driving to a recycle centre in Miami with a 12m-long iron street lamp strapped to the roof of his car.

alastair.sloane@nzherald.co.nz

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