That Guy: Gordon, bless him, is satisfied... and so am I

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Opinion

As a semi-regular columnist, I share a common bond with my readers. I like to think that often they don't really care what I write - as long as I write something.

The editor is bound to disagree with me but, although I am paid by the word, it's not really about the actual words, it's more the fact that I am there for them. I am a candle in the window so to speak. A lighthouse on life's reef.

And it's perhaps because of this approach that so many readers confide in me, so I am very much a talk-back columnist.

I see myself as a male Kerre Woodham, although I doubt very much whether Kerre sees herself as the female version of me. You never know though, and you would have to ask her.

Let's take a look at a particular situation relevant to this issue.

Recently I was approached by an anonymous reader called Gordon who needed help with his sex life.

He could have approached Kerre but, as this was more of a "men's issue", he came to me - and I am glad he did.

I am happy to report that Gordon's love life has improved ten-fold during the past few weeks as he has finally found a solution to his sexual dysfunction.

You see, Gordon, like thousands of male New Zealanders, used to suffer from premature ejaculation.

Over the years, he has tried all sorts of remedies, including Nasal sprays, intense physical training and even hypnosis - but to no avail.

In his own words, he "kept having an all-stock-must-go clearance sale" well before he and, more importantly, his partner, was ready.

As a talkback-style columnist, I am often tuned into modern scientific techniques and spend a lot of time on the internet trying to help people with their problems.

I do not charge for this as I see it as part of my commitment to making my readers happy. And it was while I was doing just such research that I came across Mr Wang's acupuncture therapy.

I was intrigued and after further research found out that Mr Wang, who is based in Howick, has been responsible for curing everything from asthma to colour blindness through his acupuncture techniques.

He has also helped thousands of people to quit smoking, plus helped those with alcohol problems.

I used the Herald on Sunday landline, phoned him and asked him whether he could help someone like Gordon with his problem.

After much consideration, he told me that he believed he could.

I immediately put Gordon in touch with Mr Wang and, six weeks later, I am happy to report that Gordon's premature ejaculation is a thing of the past.

I was eager to hear from Gordon how it all came about and he told me that regular acupuncture therapy has helped him to enjoy a fairly normal love life.

I asked him if there were any negative aspects to the procedure and this was his response: "It has to be said that I last a lot longer now when making love.

"The only negative part, I suppose, is having an old Chinese man sticking needles into my testicles while I am doing so.

"My wife also finds this a little disconcerting. We try to pretend he is not there but that is easier said than done.

"Mr Wang and his assistant have become an integral part of our love life and we are just going to have to accept that. Mr Wang has changed our lives."

Well, there you go, another satisfied reader who got help by contacting me.

If you have an issue you need help with, get in touch and I will see what I can do.

* Editor's note: Leigh, columnists can write on something other than sex.