Maybe this is the best way to vote? Spotted in John St, Ponsonby.
Odd advice from the past
AskthePast.com is a wonderful blog compiled by a history professor who finds questionable advice from very old books ...
1. From the 13th century on how to tell if someone is dead: "Moreover, if there is any doubt as to whether a person is or is not dead, apply lightly roasted onion to his nostrils, and if he be alive, he will immediately scratch his nose." (Johannes de Mirfield, Breviarium Bartholomei).
2. How to behave at a dance in 1530: "Furthermore never fart when you are dancing ... Do not have a dripping nose and do not dribble at the mouth. No woman desires a man with rabies. And refrain from spitting before the maidens. If you spit or blow your nose or sneeze, remember to turn your head away after the spasm; and remember not to wipe your nose with your fingers; do it properly with a white handkerchief." (Antonius Arena, Leges dansandi).
Tampons far better than guns, period
Two New York high school students are hoping to combat misogyny with Tampon Run, a game that cleverly replaces guns in an old-school shooter game with tampons. The girls, who graduated from the Girls Who Code camp - a programme that teaches girls to code in hopes of closing the gender gap in tech - thought it was strange that violence and guns seem to be so mainstream in our culture while talking about periods - which every woman experiences - is not. In the game, tampons are used as projectiles to throw at oncoming enemies. (Source: Time.com)
Brutally honest dating blurbs (Via AskReddit)
1. Female medical uni student who is really stressed. Enjoys the company of cats as they don't require social effort. Has probably cried and baked cookies today instead of studying.
2. Insecure, emotionally demanding male who craves attention, reassurance and regular late-night conversations about what you really meant by that thing you said a few weeks ago.
3. Likes binge-drinking, chain-smoking, and eating takeaways in bed while watching Netflix. I have an opinion on the Oxford comma. Seeking same.
4. Flawed male with unrealistically high expectations seeks perfect woman to put up with all of my shit.
5. I'm really looking for someone that hates the same things as me.
Lookalikes: Jon Toogood from Shihad and Pulitzer prize-winning "loser" Glenn Greenwald.
Comedy nostalgia: If you are old enough to remember it, you might now be old enough to enjoy it (or cringe at it). The Two Ronnies serial skit, The Worm That Turned is described with this: " The Date line is 2012, England is in the grip of a new regime of Terror. Traditionally a land of brave heros and great statesmen. Britan now laboured under the yoke of a power guarenteed to strike fear into the hearts of all men... The country is being run by women."
Picture this: Awful celebrity fan art...
Video: How to steal a cow...
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Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz