Sideswipe: May 1: Agents cause a stir

A flyer for Hibiscus Coast Barfoot agents - husband and wife duo David and Angela Howie. Photo / Supplied

A case of badvertising? Hibiscus Coast Barfoot agents, husband-and-wife duo David and Angela Howie, produced this flyer, which has offended some residents.

Welcome to Auckland

"The last time my parents drove to Auckland from Timaru, Dad was 80 and mum was 77," writes Jill Poulston. "They had a Bedford pop-top, so they could take their time. On the Southern Motorway they slipped into the inside lane, which had 'less traffic'. However, drivers passing them [on the left] pointed a single finger skyward. Eventually Dad pulled off the motorway to check the pop-top. Nothing wrong there, so back on the motorway, back to the inside lane, until Mum spotted the problem. 'Eddie,' she says to Dad, 'I think we're travelling in the fast lane, and they're trying to tell us they don't like it.' We now call this the 'Auckland wave'!"

Laws of physics #1

"Ex-students of Otahuhu College may recall 'Microbe', our head physics teacher," writes Peter Lange. "'Now class', he would intone if one of us misbehaved, 'this unworthy boy is a stationary object of 9 stone. This cane, "Bamboo Blonde", weighing 4 ounces, will strike his backside at 75 miles per hour. How far will this snivelling little toad move?' Things got confused when the 'pathetic little worm' would break the laws of physics and leap 6 feet clutching his bum in agony."

Laws of physics #2

"My physics teacher tried to demonstrate static electricity with the Van de Graaf generator last year," writes Matt. "It consists of a large metal ball at the top of a tube with a rubber belt rubbing the ball, and a grounding ball on an insulated handle connected to an alligator clip. He'd thought he'd set it up right but gave himself quite a belt when he realised he was still holding the alligator clip, which should have been clipped to the machine."