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Home / New Zealand

Sideswipe: Jan 18: Naming a restaurant after a gastric catastrophe

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
17 Jan, 2016 04:00 PM3 mins to read

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Naming a restaurant after a gastric catastrophe. Restaurant in Christchurch, on Victoria St. (Via @MoataTamaira)

Naming a restaurant after a gastric catastrophe. Restaurant in Christchurch, on Victoria St. (Via @MoataTamaira)

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

If Wall Street was a parent ...

A 6-year-old boy experienced the harsh reality of getting a loan rejected when he asked his dad for money. The kid, who wanted an advance on his pocket money for a toy, got a response letter from "DAD Savings and Loans". "We regret to inform you at this time that we are unable to provide a loan in the amount requested of $20.00," the letter read. "After reviewing your account, we have found you have insufficient funds, and a history of not doing your chores. Furthermore, over $80.00 has been spent on discretionary entertainment expenses since Christmas. This is an unsustainable amount of expenditure, and we cannot further compound the problem by financially assisting with occurring further debt at this point." One person commented on social media: "How is he supposed to build his credit rating if he can't get credit? Damn Baby Boomers."

Overselling their eggs spotted on the main road to Ngunguru - Whangarei.
Overselling their eggs spotted on the main road to Ngunguru - Whangarei.

Insurmountable dating ordeals

1. My friends were pushing and pushing me to go on a date, any date, on FindSomeone and so I met this guy at a bar. He was dressed in jogging pants and a T-shirt and he somehow wove into the conversation that he'd had a busy day but managed to get home and get his joggers off the line just before the rain so he could wear them to meet me. I wasn't into him, had one glass of wine then went to my friends' house to relay the story of the Sunday Best Jogging Pants.

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2. I met a woman online and we had enough chemistry that, after our second date, it seemed we would wind up back at my place. We were crossing the street after dinner when bam - we got hit by a cab. I slid up the windshield and on to the roof, and landed with shocking grace, somehow avoiding injury. She was not so lucky; she had both her kneecaps broken. I rode with her in the ambulance as she listed all her medications ("Don't listen," she said. "The birth control is the only one you should care about.") I felt so terrible that for the rest of the week I went with her to her apartment and carried her up her four flights of stairs. One night, a few men came by to purchase her opiates. I knew then that we were not meant to be. But, I will see her again; I'm a witness in her lawsuit.

Good read: Ten ways your life is harder than it needs to be...1. You ascribe intent. Another driver cut you off. Your friend never texted you back. Your co-worker went to lunch without you. Everyone can find a reason to be offended on a steady basis. So what caused you to be offended? You assigned bad intent to these otherwise innocuous actions. You took it as a personal affront, a slap in the face. Happy people do not do this. They don't take things personally. They don't ascribe intent to the unintentional actions of others. Read more here.

The description below the frame reads: Thanksgiving 20015, Medium hand. Drywall.
The description below the frame reads: Thanksgiving 20015, Medium hand. Drywall.

Video:There's something compelling about this clip --a washing machine brick bouncing on trampoline...

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Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

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