The principal of Summerland School, Luke Sumich, sold his school's playground on Trade Me on Sunday for $5850. A reader thought he sounded like a "bloody hard case" and "deserved a beer" after answering heaps of questions with such a winning sense ofhumour.
Q: Obviously the wood has been outside in the rain and weather for some time. Do you think it would be suitable for ceremonial burnings?
A: Unless you were a Viking or were currently in Finland you wouldn't need wood for ceremonial burning. It's tanalised H5 timber and Colin Meads stands by tanalised, unlike successive governments who thought kiln-dried timber wouldn't rot.
Q: I see this awesome playground requires pickup, will it fit in the boot of my Honda?
A: If it's a Jazz it will be great for heavy loads. The Civic has the adaptability of the hatchback and fold-down seats. And the Accord is also a winner because it comes with a slipper-wearing pair of oldies who will definitely have a secure load. At 35km/h you should get your playground to hungryPC in Claudelands in about 13 hours.
Trolley themes knows its market
On November 22, at the Auckland Domain, 50 teams from around the country will compete for racing glory at the Red Bull Trolley GP. Theme and design is paramount and this year there is a Chainsaw Massacre-themed trolley driven by zombies, a Sharknado contraption and a Magic Carpet trolley with a Genie (A-Lad-In a Carpet). One of the most ingenious (or cynical) designs is a team that dresses up as zookeepers and delivers a can of baked beans which, when opened by the judges, explodes with a noxious gas, and simultaneously triggers unmistakable audio, to announce the arrival of team "Jurassic Fart".
Steering lock has its uses
"The 'broken steering wheel' in yesterday's Sideswipe is in fact a 'steering lock'," says Matt. "When you take the keys out of any modern car the steering will lock into a position when turned a certain amount. It is an anti-theft device. Therefore if you need to push a car, best leave the keys in the ignition. It reminded me of when I helped a gentleman move his car off a busy Auckland road in rush hour. He was told to stay in the car and steer, while I pushed. As the car got moving he jumped out to help ... unfortunately we had reached a point where the road went downhill. We both watched as his car hit a block wall and I just shook my head."
Flag finalists first impressions
which will be New Zealand's next top flag?
With the release of the long list of flag contestants released this week, not everyone can pick a favourite. Ex-pat Matt Sudain reckons our choices for the new flag, "all look like logo options for a provincial freight company done by the owner's son." And a commenter on the Guardian Australia described the silver fern alternative flag thus: "It looks like a vegetarian's pirate flag". But Andrew Dixon has more grave branding concerns: "I look at most and see tsunami," he says. "Not good for tourism." And if you are in turmoil about which frond/tsunami combo to vote for, let a celebrity make up your mind for you.
