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Home / New Zealand

Sideswipe: August 11: Cat and mouse

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
10 Aug, 2014 05:00 PM3 mins to read

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Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

A reader from Te Hihi, near Papakura, came home to find her cat Scruffy had cornered this rat. "I phoned my neighbour (who is in his 80s). He came over with a golf club and managed to hit it off the rail and it ran outside. The cat watched with a look of disdain and made no effort to chase it!" she says.

The voice of no reason at the bank
"Had an interesting bank experience today trying to change a password," writes Val. "Was asked to call customer services to confirm security details. After a long pause was denied access and asked to turn up at my ANZ bank with photo id. Reason for problem - my voice did not not fit my age profile. As a woman of a certain age (two years older than Hillary Clinton and the same age as Helen Mirren) was told my voice sounded too young. Reverse sexism - or a reverse compliment?"

Never too young to plan for retirement
"I just had to email you about a piece of mail delivered to our house today," writes Mike. "It is from Summerset and has a letter and flyer about retirement living options. The best bit? It was addressed to my 8-year-old son, James! He won't, hopefully, be thinking about retirement for at least a few decades. Summerset probably won't even exist then. This has to qualify for us as the most ridiculous piece of mail ever sent/received."

Bathroom door locks vital for mothers
"There I was, sitting on the loo when in wandered my eldest, to wash her hands. My youngest daughter crashed in, looking for her and her best friend followed. Then the dog arrived to plant her muzzle lovingly between my knees. Our bathroom was getting crowded. "Out, all of you," I yelled. Give your mother some peace and quiet! We did install a lock eventually."

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White lies Kiwis were told as kids
A reader writes: "One night when my daughter was about 4 we had chicken nibbles for dinner and as usual we would leave some for my husband for lunch the next day. She really wanted some more but I was adamant she couldn't have any as it is for Daddy. When she was finished she took her plate to the kitchen but took a long time to come back ... I yelled from the lounge for her to leave the chicken alone. She came back very astonished that I knew and then I told her that I could see through walls. The kids believed me for years after that."

There or thereabouts ...
Tweet goodness: Cabbie: "So where are you from?" Me: "Libya." Cabbie: "Oh, it's bad there, right?" Me: "Yes." Cabbie: "I hope your country wins against that Ebola." (Via @LibiaLiberty)

Picture this: "Awkward Moments (Not Found In Your Average) Children's Bible" pair up real bible verses with darkly humorous illustrations (Definitely not for children)

New meme: Have you played Office Safari yet?

Books: This is a really odd cover for a new edition of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory...

Video:

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Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

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