NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
    • The Great NZ Road Trip
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • Deloitte Fast 50
    • Generate wealth weekly
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Opinion
Home / New Zealand

Sideswipe: April 11: Training for Easter

Ana Samways
Opinion by
Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
10 Apr, 2014 04:15 PM3 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save
    Share this article

Jesus is alive and in training for Easter on Remuera Rd. "The cross had a wheel, should it get a little heavy,'' said our witness.

Oversexed, overpaid ... and in Northcote

A reader writes: "During World War II and before the harbour bridge was built, the main means of transport to and from downtown Auckland to the North Shore was by ferry. With the city being full of American servicemen and the 'live hard, die young' attitude of the time, it was common practice for young couples to catch the 10-minute ferry ride from downtown to Northcote Pt for a bit of privacy. My father, who would have been about 9 at the time, spent a weekend collecting a cardboard box full of used condoms from the Northcote Pt reserve which he took to school on Monday for show and tell. From there the story gets hazy but I believe the box was confiscated."

In the UK

1. Despite the spread of cafe culture in Britain, instant coffee still accounts for 77 per cent of the coffee Brits buy to drink at home. In Italy it accounts for just 1 per cent, in France 4 per cent and 7 per cent in the US. Convenience rather than taste is the biggest factor.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

2. If you really want to be different when naming your offspring, don't just reinvent the spellings, go for an extinct name like Fanny, Gertrude, Gladys, Margery or Marjorie, Muriel, Cecil, Rowland, Willie, Bertha or Blodwen (which haven't appeared in the latest birth records), or try an endangered name such as Clifford, Horace, Harold, Leslie, Norman, Doris, Edna, Ethel, Hilda, Marion or Phyllis (which have near-disappeared completely, too).

Buck-ing broncos

Tony Ryan writes: "I bred racehorses in Upper Hutt in the 1970s. The Reserve Bank shredded old banknotes there and having read about something similar in the US I managed to convince the bank that the shredded notes would not attract any interest once they had been used by me as bedding for my horse boxes. I duly took horse floats full of bank notes to my stud for a few years hoping that they would be functional and would subliminally convince the horses to try to win the real thing on race day. Although a few won races from time to time, none ever approached the figures they had slept on."

Confessions of a condom maker

Raewyn writes: "My husband worked for Pacific Rubber in Wellington in the 1950s. He (and other workers) confess to making the condoms for the army out of hot water bottle material instead of the usual material for that purpose. He wishes to apologise to the army boys for the extra, er, rigidity."Jesus is alive and in training for Easter on Remuera Rd. "The cross had a wheel, should it get a little heavy," said our witness.

Discover more

Opinion

Reasonable vs unusable

31 Mar 03:15 PM
Opinion

First find for gardener

01 Apr 03:15 PM
Opinion

Not Loling in Switzerland

02 Apr 03:15 PM
New Zealand

Pregnant by morning

03 Apr 04:30 PM

Office humour

Picture this#1: Smithsonian magazine announce the 60 finalists in their photo contest. Here's a sneak peak...

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Picture this#2: Prime Minister John Key grabbing a girl's ponytail

Picture this #3: Trees growing through military helmets and guns ...

Video: A guy goes about his daily life, living it helping others...A tearjerker from Thai Life Insurance...

NZ Herald app users click here for today's video.

Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

Save
    Share this article

Latest from New Zealand

New Zealand

Person found seriously injured near Queenstown, police responding

14 Sep 08:09 AM
New Zealand

Indian national with NZ-born child to be deported for indecent assault of woman

14 Sep 08:00 AM
New Zealand

'Prepare to be without power overnight': High winds affect thousands across North Island

14 Sep 07:14 AM

Sponsored

Kiwi campaign keeps on giving

07 Sep 12:00 PM
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from New Zealand

Person found seriously injured near Queenstown, police responding
New Zealand

Person found seriously injured near Queenstown, police responding

Emergency crews were called to the scene just after 6.15pm this evening.

14 Sep 08:09 AM
Indian national with NZ-born child to be deported for indecent assault of woman
New Zealand

Indian national with NZ-born child to be deported for indecent assault of woman

14 Sep 08:00 AM
'Prepare to be without power overnight': High winds affect thousands across North Island
New Zealand

'Prepare to be without power overnight': High winds affect thousands across North Island

14 Sep 07:14 AM


Kiwi campaign keeps on giving
Sponsored

Kiwi campaign keeps on giving

07 Sep 12:00 PM
NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP