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Home / New Zealand

Rugby World Cup Road Trip: Life on the Road Part II - Revenge of the Doo-Doo

By Matt Johnson
Herald online·
5 Oct, 2011 02:00 AM3 mins to read

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Some signs simply said poo which not only leaves potential customers in doubt as to its origins, but might have tourists thinking they were entering some kind of Militarized Zone of No.2s. Photo / Supplied

Some signs simply said poo which not only leaves potential customers in doubt as to its origins, but might have tourists thinking they were entering some kind of Militarized Zone of No.2s. Photo / Supplied

Opinion

One of the great things about a Kea Campervan is the gentle speed with which it allows one to appreciate the magnificent roadside jumble sale that is New Zealand.

In one 25 minute stretch on the way to Temuka, I passed the kind of bargains that would thwart any wannabe speed-demon: broccoli, carrots, knitwear, apples, a caravan, what appeared to be one of the same motocross bikes those skeletons used to chase Ralph Macchio on in the original Karate Kid, and bags of horse manure.

This means, conceivably (if your expense account can cover it ), by the time you arrive in Ashburton, you could stage your own stunt show by leaping a caravan covered in dung on a motorbike while eating your 5-a-day of fruit & vege. In your brand new, hand-knitted beanie.

To those who follow it, it is perhaps the fluctuations in the poo-Nasdaq that prove the most puzzling. Nearer Christchurch, it was 50c a bag... clearly, because in major urban areas there is quite a bit of it to be had for free (again, for those who know where to look). But elsewhere, in say Rakaia or Winslow, up to date pricing structures were unavailable. Some signs simply said Poo (insert exclamation mark here) which not only leaves potential customers in doubt as to its origins, but might have tourists thinking they were entering some kind of Militarized Zone of No.2s.

Even when I banged on doors and said "is that s**t for sale or what?" it was difficult to get a clear response. So... although I failed economics at school (because I was crap at it), once people have finished talking about Greece (which is also in the poo), I definitely think this is something our own local EEC should have a look at.

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Another problem is signage and copyright issues. If someone near Waikuku were to smear a Heineken Bottle or a silver fern out of dung, all those lawyers and bean-counters at the NZRU would have to come down and clean it up. And no one wants to see that.

So what's the strangest thing you've seen for sale on the side of the road in New Zealand? Your weirdest pull-over roadside purchase? We have a bag of something to give away to today's winner.

No prizes for guessing what's inside it.

* Follow Matt across New Zealand at his RWC Road Trip blog or on twitter @KeaKaharoadtrip.

* Bid on Trade Me for your chance to win pieces of the Kea Kaha-Mobile, with our WHEN KEAS ATTACK auction.

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14 Sep 03:00 AM
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Rugby World Cup Road Trip: When keas attack!

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