Porsche Panamera Turbo: An air of excess

The Porsche Panamera Turbo is functional but just a touch cheesy. Photo / Supplied

The Porsche Panamera Turbo has a rear spoiler that extends at 90km/h in three parts: the centre section rises out of the bodywork while two side extensions simultaneously arc outwards.

Once deployed, the wing adjusts automatically for optimum aerodynamic performance. So it's a functional device - just unnecessarily complex and a little bit cheesy. Entertaining, all the same. That sums up the fastest, most expensive version of Porsche's Panamera five-door. It's a two-tonne, 5m-long machine that rockets to 100km/h in 4.2 seconds and tears the tarmac out of tight corners, thanks to full-time four-wheel drive.

Can you justify $350,000? Anything's possible. With the optional $4350 Sport Chrono Plus package (as fitted to our test car), the Panamera Turbo does the 100km/h sprint in four seconds neat, which makes it supercar-fast. Even without it, the Panamera has a sense of over-the-top build/engineering quality that makes it seem a value proposition.

What you won't be lured by is sex appeal. Porsches are never pretty, but the Panamera is especially ugly. I won't go into detail. You have eyes.

So it's an easy car to make fun of. But in the face of adversity, nothing succeeds like excess. People might point, but they'll stop laughing when you plant the big pedal. The twin-turbo 4.8-litre V8 summons 368kW and a staggering 770Nm with the Sports Chrono Plus package, which adds an overboost function to the turbocharger, shorter transition time between power/overrun and quicker shifts for the eight-speed dual-clutch PDK transmission.

The Panamera Turbo is not a fun, nimble car like a 911 and is not meant to be. It's an imposing, crushingly fast A-to-B express which is probably brilliant on the autoroutes and autobahns of Europe but a bit too wide and limited in outward visibility for the roads of New Zealand. It does not lack handling precision or traction, but the Panamera still takes up more than its share of the road. The Turbo demolishes the 80-120km/h overtaking increment in 5.1 seconds; press the Sport button (which is different from Sport Chrono Plus) and the steering gets sharper, the throttle becomes more aggressive, the stability control less intrusive and the air suspension drops by 25mm.

Around town, it's a handful. The PDK can be grumpy at low speed, and the stop-start/hill holder functions feel intrusive and clumsy. However, excellent graphics for the parking radar and a rear-facing camera help you slot the car into tight spaces, and urban driving is at least a chance to enjoy the luxury of a $350k car. The four individual seats are bisected by a single centre console, there's a 14-speaker Bose digital sound system, exquisitely soft leather upholstery and the all-singing Porsche Communication Management (PCM) touch screen. But there's still the chance to be appalled by the options list: voice control, which is standard in a $23,990 Ford Fiesta, costs $1060. And $810 for a ski bag? Please.

You'll notice that I've fallen into the trap of continually comparing the Panamera to the 911, when I really shouldn't. Neither has anything to do with the other. But when Porsche has one iconic model on its books and another that represents a dramatic change in direction, it's easy to regard the latter as a threat to the former.

None of this will be of any consequence to the owner of a Panamera Turbo. A general aura of excess is key to the appeal of this car. Hang on, did I say this was the fastest Panamera? No longer.

Just announced is the Panamera Turbo S, with a 37kW power increase. Totally unnecessary, possibly a bit irresponsible. And therefore a must-have upgrade for a Panamera Turbo owner.

Great at stretching out fuel consumption
The Panamera looks like a stretched 911, but that's just visual conceit. It's actually based on the Cayenne platform, with the engine at the front and a choice of two- or four-wheel drive. It's not all about ridiculous performance, either: at the other end of the scale from our Turbo model is the new Panamera diesel.

This $192,400 oil-burner manages 6.5 litres per 100km in the Combined cycle - pretty close to half the fuel consumption of our Panamera Turbo.

The bottom line:
Staggeringly fast, supremely luxurious, idiosyncratic and very, very ugly. You can question the ethos and outward style of the Panamera Turbo, but it's hard to argue with its ability to combine supercar speed with a sumptuous cabin for four adults.