It's a meeting so prestigious, Prince Andrew himself is invited to attend.
That's Prince Andrew, the man currently under suspicion of liaisons with a teenage "sex slave" arranged by his good friend, a convicted paedophile. The same man who likes making deals with foreign despots and propping up his greedy, grasping ex-wife with taxpayer money. He graced the Davos World Economic Forum meeting this year to give the glitterati the benefit of his many years of indefinable excellence.
Even better, one of Prince Andrew's security brushed past our Prime Minister. OUR Prime Minister! It just goes to show how far New Zealand has come in the world.
Even before John Key leapt to Prince Andrew's defence on the underage sex charge, cleverly garnering himself extensive worldwide publicity with his unorthodox, some might say completely inappropriate, views, you could see the scene was set for huge amounts of jolly japes. The first coverage I devoured of this incredibly mind-blasting event was the Prime Minister pelting his very own prince of dark arts, Wayne Eagleson, with snowballs. I knew from that moment the import of his adventure at Davos was not lost on Mr Key.
How right I was, as later revealed. It was a chance to open doors, to "reconnect" with Europe. Luxembourg was mentioned several times, although it's unclear precisely why. It seemed as though Mr Key may have caught Ban Ki-moon's eye and said "gidday" over croissants at some point. "The magic of Davos", declared our PM, was in "walking along the sidebar issues". But central to it all, of course, was our absolutely outstanding economy, and the enormously great shape it was in.
We are told Mr Key was in hot demand at the four day gab-fest. You may have thought Angela Merkel of Germany or Li Keqiang of China might have attracted more attention. Islamic State, which all participants say they were concerned about, didn't seem to lead to a head of steam around the likes of Abdel-fattah al-Sisi of Egypt, or Haidar al-Abadi, the new leader of Iraq, compared with the Kiwis. Technology giants Jack Ma of Alibaba, Marissa Mayer of Yahoo and Sheryl Sandberg of Facebook, not to mention opera superstar Andrea Bocelli, were all eschewed, if we are to believe the hype, in favour of hearing the story of the New Zealand economy, of milk, logs and property, told with an endearing nasal twang.
It's actually a story of reducing Government spending, casualising our workforce, taking no steps to cool the property market, selling off our natural assets, ignoring inequality, ignoring high levels of personal debt, ignoring environmental change and privatising essential services. It is the story of the short-term benefits of trickle-down economics, and that is why, if in fact it does, it plays so well to the Davos crowd. Because it's a crowd that are trickle-down disciples, believing more of the same will magically lift people out of mass unemployment and poverty, eventually.
Evidence suggests we are heading in the opposite direction.
In 2016, 1 per cent of the population of the world will own more than the other 99 per cent, and in a few short years, half the world's wealth will belong to just 100 people.
Those at Davos, seemingly representing the interests of the very wealthy, like to think they are working to make the world a better place - as long as they are not inconvenienced in doing so.
If tax loopholes and havens are not closed, nothing will change. If the money generated by a more equitable tax take is not used for more and better public investment, nothing will change. Safeguards that ensure people get paid fairly and have secure jobs may take some initial discomfort on the part of business and government, but if these things don't change, the world will not become a better place.
Interestingly, one superstar at Davos John Key mentioned, but dismissed as more suitable for his son, was pop superstar will.i.am (William Adams). It's a shame. will.i.am came from acute inner-city poverty to become a very rich and famous man, but has used his wealth to sponsor children from poor backgrounds, helping them learn computer programming and carve out a viable career. Someone with something actually helpful to say, doing something actually helpful in the fight against inequality. Well, who cares? We are New Zealand, and we are the rock stars.
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