The PM misses the race - but makes a secret visit to Team NZ afterwards, while Simeon Brown talks big about the gangs, and Simon Bridges addresses his return to the preferred PM ratings.
Monday: PM's cunning ploy to make journalists miss the America's Cup race
PM Jacinda Ardern usually keeps her post-Cabinet press conferences to less than half an hour before calling "last question" – something that frustrates journalists who don't get their questions in.
This time, she took a different tack.
Ardern's press conference began just before the first America's Cup race of the day.
She went on and on and on as the first exciting race of the contest played out: the one in which Team NZ overtook Luna Rossa.
Those journalists who enjoy the racing were left quietly praying for the "last question" to come, so they could watch the end. It came after 46 minutes - at exactly the moment that the race ended.
Even Ardern's fiancee Clarke Gayford was watching and tweeting about the race instead.
Monday: Race to the bottom for the preferred Prime Ministers:
Simon Bridges clearly took heart from Team NZ's victories on Monday: "Never give up!" he tweeted after Team NZ's win from being 2000m behind.
It prompted speculation he saw hope for himself in the team: speculation that was heightened when Bridges returned to the ranks of preferred Prime Minister in that night's 1 News Colmar Brunton poll.
Bridges came in at a mighty 1 per cent.
Bridges told Newstalk ZB on Friday that Judith Collins on 8 per cent was "800 per cent more popular" than he was, and he was not planning a tilt at his old job.
It may or may not be significant in assessing the truth of this that in the very same interview, Bridges also insisted he and Speaker Trevor Mallard "get on very well".
Act leader David Seymour, who was half as popular as Collins on 4 per cent, quickly took issue with Bridges' maths, posted "the difference between 1 and 8 is 700 per cent. Just. Saying."
Thursday: Mismatch of the week
Parliament is a place where there are often mismatches in opponents, but few are as stark as that between National's police spokesman Simeon Brown and the Mongrel Mob.
Simeon Brown, who turns 30 next month, is one of Parliament's most youthful-looking MPs and does not have what one would describe as an intimidating physique. He is frequently the subject of "jokes" about whether he is old enough to drive.
He was, however, all muscle on the keyboard when it came to trash-talking the gangs on social media.
The Waikato Mongrel Mob was scheduled to give a submission on Brown's bill on firearms reforms this week. As it had the week before, it pulled out.
Brown tweeted: "The Waikato Mongrel Mob Kingdom were scheduled to submit on my Firearm Prohibition Orders Bill today - but have cancelled as 'no longer available'. Bunch of scaredy cats."
Beehive Diaries is sure the scaredy cats are shaking in their hobnailed boots.
The Waikato Mongrel Mob Kingdom were scheduled to submit on my Firearm Prohibition Orders Bill today - but have cancelled as ‘no longer available’. Bunch of scaredy cats.— Simeon Brown (@SimeonBrownMP) March 17, 2021
Friday: Ardern's secret visit to Team NZ
Ardern's enthusiasm for the America's Cup appears to be somewhat less than Beehive Diaries's is: Ardern did not turn up for any of the racing days, or the final race or the awards ceremony after wards.
The last time she was photographed with Team NZ head Grant Dalton and skipper Peter Burling was in 2019 at the launch of the boat.
However, Beehive Diaries has learned Ardern made a secret visit this morning to the base to congratulate the team.
Others with Labour links were more openly enthusiastic about the event: former PM Helen Clark went on the chase boat for the final race as a patron of Emirates Team NZ.
Clear win by @EmiratesTeamNZ in Race 10 to take @americascup today. Thrilling as Patron of ETNZ to be out on the water today & witness this this proud moment. Full congratulations to whole team behind this victory. pic.twitter.com/69pkbOuBDx— Helen Clark (@HelenClarkNZ) March 17, 2021
Speaker Trevor Mallard also sprinted up to watch from Parliament - ending up on the stage with the team after.