OPINION: Hunky and the fluffies make for addictive TV

TRASHY TELLY: Watching women compete for "hunky" Jordan Mauger's affection is proving addictive viewing.

I quite like watching reality TV.

I know it is staged for the camera. I know most of it is mindless rubbish and has a high cringe factor.

The humdinger of them all is the latest round of The Bachelor NZ. Yes, I know. How sad that a nearly 60-year-old male would even watch such trash. But give me a comfy chair, some Cadbury dairy milk, a bowl of goody goody gumdrops icecream, some trashy TV, and I am like a pig in doo dahs!

My question -- how can so many assumingly intelligent women turn themselves so quickly into a bunch of fluffy airheads?

"Oh, Jordan sat next to me and it was like, totally amazing." "And oh, after I fell off the boat, Jordan hosed me down and it was the most exciting thing that has ever happened to me."

Apparent Hunk Meister Jordan, who is on the pull -- or as he puts it, looking for love -- hasn't even said anything much of interest so far.

"Can I come and join you girls?" did get some of them fluttering.

Not all are impressed though. A couple of the fluffs have left of their own accord, realising Hunky is not for them.

After the second episode it was apparent that the whole thing was a jack up. Most unpleasant, nasty Naz spent all the "one-on-one" time she had with Hunky over two episodes moaning about the other girls. She has a hit list and is determined to get rid of everyone on it. Her deputy Claudia got the shove last week so Naz doesn't have quite the support she would have hoped for.

Surely anyone looking for a lifetime of love would be completely put off by Naz's unattractive behaviour. But not our Hunky. The producers must have jumped for joy when she turned up. Hunky will have been told that she is a must-keep, because the viewers will be waiting each week to see her kicked out. But, we don't want that for a while yet, okay?

Most nights, Hunky grabs a fluffy and wanders off for a bit of one-on-one, while the others sit and watch with ear to ear TV smiles, while seething. Then, a production assistant comes along, winds up their key and off they clatter to interrupt the love birds, sitting in an arbour and talking sweet nothings in each other's ear.

"Do you mind if I interrupt?" What do you think, silly?

Some of them must be getting a little miffed. Hunky takes one on a date, tells them he feels there is a connection, gives them jewellery and they lip sync. The next night he takes another one on a date, tells them he feels there is a connection, gives them jewellery and they lip sync. Then the next night ... blah blah blah.

I'm surprised they don't have to wear name tags.

I have to go now. The rose ceremony is about to start and I have to get the Aphid dust out.