KEY POINTS:
Fictious election candidate, Dennis Plant, is standing for the non-existent seat of Wakatipu South. The New Zealand Herald was so impressed by the musings of Mr Plant and his party, Future New Zealand, in the TVNZ mockumentary, The Pretender, that we offered him a blog for the last
two weeks of his campaign.
Hello. Welcome to my second blog post.
On Monday, I spent the morning attending a Polynesian festival, celebrating Labor Day, and was gifted with a small carved oar. After that there was some dancing.
But even though I enjoyed my oar, my mind kept wandering back to our greatest current problem: namely, the worst financial crises the world has faced since 1929 (also known as the Great Depression)
But, I would like to make it clear: this is not the time to panic.
Some people have been wondering if politicians are fearmongering, and then exploiting the crises for their own ends by simply taking their preexisting policies, and pretending that they are in reaction to the crises, while suggesting that unless they are voted into government, the country is doomed.
Personally, I find such cynical tactics disgraceful. I've noticed that other parties, particularly the ones in opposition to me, are engaging in this strategy almost daily. Now is not the time for divisive politics.
As I walked around Westgate Mall that afternoon, I saw that average everyday New Zealanders were becoming concerned about their futures.
People are asking so many questions. Some seem worried, others confused, many are overweight, or can't understand how to use a toilet. But as I walked around the Mall, chatted and shook hands with average everyday people such as Richard Chapman, who works in a tie shop, or Amy Watson, (who did some other service type job), I couldn't help but wonder what their smiling faces would look like with tears running down their cheeks, their tiny dreams are crushed, as everything they once held dear will soon be torn away.
Fortunately voting for Future New Zealand will allow me to implement my plan for a gondola between Glenorchy - through Fiordland - and into Milford Sound will provide just the kind of economic infrastructure investment rescue guarantee fund package plan that will save average New Zealanders such as Amy or Richard, and put New Zealand on the fast track to success, whereas voting for any other party would probably cause the creation of a mythical monster such as Godzilla or a Yeti.
Meanwhile, journalists have been asking me why I'm so much like Barack Obama (my popularity!) and whether my wife enjoys sex (she does!).
Tomorrow I will be travelling to South Auckland to discuss my passion for the things I will be seeing in South Auckland, and talking to shopkeepers about their scumbag problem, and then maybe go to Rainbow's End.
Dennis Plant
You can visit the Future New Zealand website and also see more of me here.