NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather forecasts

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
    • The Great NZ Road Trip
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
    • Cooking the Books
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • What the Actual
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / New Zealand

Sentencing of mosque gunman Brenton Tarrant: Widow living a 'life imprisonment of sadness and loneliness'

Anna Leask
By Anna Leask
Senior Journalist - crime and justice·NZ Herald·
24 Aug, 2020 05:10 AM7 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

Brenton Harrison Tarrant wanted to burn down the two Christchurch mosques after the March 15, 2019 terror attacks where he murdered 51 people. Video / Chris Tarpey

GRAPHIC CONTENT WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS DETAILS WHICH READERS MIGHT FIND UPSETTING

As Musa Vali Suleman Patel bled to death on the floor of the Linwood Islamic Centre his wife Saira tried frantically to save his life with her bare hands.

He had been shot in the back and was bleeding "horrendously".

Saira Patel pushed hard on the gaping bullet hole that had torn into the back of her "soulmate", piercing through his skin and into his bones.

She screamed for help, she begged paramedics to save him, to operate then and there.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

And then the police arrived and she had to leave, stepping over bloodied, dying, wounded bodies to get to safety.

Hours later at the hospital she could not find him, and the reality started to hit her – her love may not have survived.

Saira Patel and her sons Ikram and Irfan were among the first 24 people to read their Victim Impact Statements in court at the first day of the sentencing for Christchurch mass murderer Brenton Harrison Tarrant. The sentencing has finished for today and will resume at 10am tomorrow.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Saira and Musa Patel had been married for 37 years and raised five children.

They were grandparents to three young children.

They were at the Linwood Islamic Centre when Tarrant stormed the building and opened fire on March 15 2019.

Saira Patel talks about the death of her husband Musa Vali Suleman Patel, via video link to the High Court in Christchurch. Photo / Pool
Saira Patel talks about the death of her husband Musa Vali Suleman Patel, via video link to the High Court in Christchurch. Photo / Pool

"I heard a gunshot… at first I thought a tyre had blown out but when I heard more shots, I knew it was a gun," she said.

Discover more

New Zealand|crime

Comment | Why we should send mosque gunman back to Australia

18 Aug 08:48 PM
New Zealand|crime

Christchurch terror attack: Why I won't face my wife's killer

22 Aug 05:00 PM
New Zealand|crime

Christchurch mosque attack: Case at a glance as gunman's sentencing nears

22 Aug 05:00 PM
New Zealand|crime

Christchurch terror attack: Heightened security around courthouse for mass murderer sentencing next week

20 Aug 12:35 AM

"I was the first one to yell 'somebody's shooting, somebody's shooting'.

"The shooter kept firing and went around the mosque looking for an entrance… my husband had been yelling to everyone to get down on the floor.

"I knew at that moment that we were all going to die in seconds."

She grabbed her phone and messaged her children telling her there was a shooter, that she and Musa were going to die, that they loved them - and to get help.

Then she stretched both of her arms out to her husband and beckoned to him to come and sit with her.

"So we could die together," she explained.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Soon, Musa Patel joined his wife.

"He came and sat next to me. I saw horrific blood pouring from his mouth and nose… I realised he had been shot… I didn't know which part of the body.

"I pulled my husband on top of me and screamed "help, help, please help.'.

"It was extremely painful to feel so helpless while watching your soulmate take his last breath."

Paramedics arrived and Saira Patel begged them to save her husband.

He was able to tell paramedics – in a soft voice as the life drained from him - his name and that he had been shot in the back.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"I pulled his shirt up and saw the bullet… the bullet was very visible as it had pierced itself inside the bones… pressed both my hands on the bullet holes but my hands kept slipping off because of the heavy blood flow," she recalled.

"At first I thought they would operate right there and then…. And take him to hospital.

"I thought this was New Zealand and my husband would be saved… I held on to my husband's arms for about 10 minutes…. Until I was asked by the police to go outside."

Armed police guarding the entrance to Christchurch hospital following a shooting at Linwood Mosque in Christchurch. Photo / Amber Allott
Armed police guarding the entrance to Christchurch hospital following a shooting at Linwood Mosque in Christchurch. Photo / Amber Allott

She was taken to Christchurch Hospital where she frantically searched for her husband, the father of her five children.

"I was terrified… it was completely chaotic… wounded and dead people kept arriving in ambulances."

"The scene was a war zone with wailing and family members of the deceased fainting while received news of the deaths of their loves ones. "

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

It would take days for authorities to confirm that Musa Patel was among the dead.

Saira Patel said the death of her husband had put her in a "life imprisonment" of sadness and loneliness.

Shortly before the shooting the couple had decided to go and live in Australia where all their children were located.

They went to Christchurch to visit relatives before they left.

The visit turned to absolute tragedy.

Ikram Patel – who lives in Australia - had his statement read next and spoke of parents who had worked hard to build a deeply moral and strong family.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"He died in the arms of his wife of nearly 37 years," Ikram said.

"Not only did he die in the embrace of his wife but in the embrace of Allah."

Musa Patel was a renowned and respected imam.

His son said he was a man who provided and example of "faith, strength and love".

He was born in India but moved to Fiji.

They then settled in New Zealand.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

He instilled high work ethics and values in his children who all live and work in Australia.

"My father's grandchildren will now never know the love and guidance of this caring man," Ikram said.

"Whilst my father would respect others rights to worship and believe… he was not to be afforded the same courtesy.

"The mass shooting… sent shock waves across the world. Described as a terrorist attack… it targeted people peacefully worshipping and practising their religion which is a fundamental right.

"The attack that took my father from his family was against his core values.

"Forgiveness is a tenet of Islam, but I cannot forgive this attacker."

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Ikram Patel worried about the impact of the tragedy on Musa's three grandchildren.

"While we enjoy democracy in New Zealand, this does not give licence to a violent and hatred minority to trample the core of people's democratic rights," he said.

Brenton Tarrant is being sentenced on 51 murder, 40 attempted murder and one terrorism charge. Photo / Pool
Brenton Tarrant is being sentenced on 51 murder, 40 attempted murder and one terrorism charge. Photo / Pool

Irfan Patel's recorded statement was played.

He said the attack was "like living a nightmare with everything coming to a stop".

Receiving the message from his mother saying she and his father were about to die and "we love you all" was horrendous.

"Within hours of the shooting we had rung far and wide in search of hope that my father had survived the shooting ... Our search was a dead end," he said.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Irfan said three months before the massacre his father officiated at his wedding.

He spoke of his mother going to hospital barefoot, bereft and "with nothing but a bloodstained purse".

Irfan got to Christchurch and was finally able to confirm his father had been killed.

"This just sends chills to my spine ... life may not be precious for the killer, but it is for us," he said.

"I was finally able to see my father ... his body cold as ice, with blood flakes stuck on his face and body ... this was the time I totally broke up.

"The most important decision maker, the pillar of our lives and my role model was killed in front of my mother.

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"Every morning I wake up to a feeling of emptiness and loss.

"Since this incident I have struggled to cope with life."

Irfan said the events that unfolded left a huge hole in his family – and his future children would never meet their grandfather.

He wanted to make sure Tarrant knew the damage he had done, not just to the Patel family but to all families who had to see a loved one in a mortuary, blood stained and with bullet wounds.

All at the hands of "a merciless killer".

Save

    Share this article

Latest from New Zealand

New Zealand

Her husband died years ago. Then she found a 'miracle' in her house's charred ruin

09 May 06:00 PM
New Zealand

Local contract for $70.5m Napier council and library precinct

09 May 06:00 PM
Premium
Letters to the Editor

Letters: Brooke van Velden should remember she rode women’s wave to win Tamaki electorate

09 May 06:00 PM

One tiny baby’s fight to survive

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from New Zealand

Her husband died years ago. Then she found a 'miracle' in her house's charred ruin

Her husband died years ago. Then she found a 'miracle' in her house's charred ruin

09 May 06:00 PM

'For the unluckiest people, we are very lucky.'

Local contract for $70.5m Napier council and library precinct

Local contract for $70.5m Napier council and library precinct

09 May 06:00 PM
Premium
Letters: Brooke van Velden should remember she rode women’s wave to win Tamaki electorate

Letters: Brooke van Velden should remember she rode women’s wave to win Tamaki electorate

09 May 06:00 PM
Gisborne mayor invites Act leader to witness community support efforts

Gisborne mayor invites Act leader to witness community support efforts

09 May 06:00 PM
Connected workers are safer workers 
sponsored

Connected workers are safer workers 

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • What the Actual
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven CarGuide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP