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Former assistant commissioner Clint Rickards said he resigned from the police because he wanted to put his family ahead of his ego.
A 37-minute interview with Mr Rickards was broadcast on Radio Waatea this morning.
Mr Rickards told broadcaster Willy Jackson that he did not rape Louise Nicholas
but he was ashamed of his behaviour that included two "sexual occasions" with Ms Nicholas who was then a teenager.
"My family have been through hell and back. It's time to put my family first and ego last. I would love to keep fighting but it's had a major effect on my family and extended whanau," Mr Rickards said.
The former assistant police commissioner Clint Rickards says Louise Nicholas is a liar who needs professional help, but he would not confirm his support for convicted rapists Brad Shipton and Bob Schollum.
"Whatever I say will be misconstrued. It's time to move on," Mr Rickards said.
Mr Rickards told Jackson denied he was a rapist and said he had seen what rape does to a family.
"I didn't do those things, Willy. If I had done those things, I'd be in jail," Mr Rickards said.
"I did some things that I'm ashamed of and I've apologised to my family," he said.
"Some of the things I got up to were unacceptable and I'm ashamed of that. I had two young children. But I never raped anyone," Mr Rickards said.
He said the Rotorua Police Station was like any other police station in New Zealand in the 1980s, and 99.9 per cent of the police officers were good.
Mr Rickards made special mention of the support he had received from Maori Affairs Minister Parekura Horomia and Labour MP Nanaia Mahuta.
A spokeswoman for Mr Horomia would neither confirm or deny the minister's support. She did not put the questions to Mr Horomia.
Mr Rickards said Maori Party co-leader Pita Sharples had been to his home to show his support.
Mr Rickards accused the media of unbalanced reporting on his case.
He also talked about his 28-year career with the police after joining up and graduating at age 18 before going undercover for four years.
"To say I wasn't affected would not be true. I dealt with the lowest of the low. I dealt with drug dealers and motorcycle gangs. You name it, I lived with those people. You certainly get conditioned," Mr Rickards said.
He said later, when Louise Nicholas' rape allegations surfaced in 2004, he felt betrayed by the then Police Commissioner Rob Robinson.
"I believe he was a good commissioner but there were issues there that later on in life we had disagreements about. We had a short discussion about the allegations and basically he distanced himself from me," Mr Rickards said.
But the case has not wavered his support for the police, who he said do great work.
Mr Rickards said he was looking forward to spending time with his family over Christmas and would not be watching the news or reading the newspapers.
