"Even now I love you and want you," a woman wrote to her boyfriend after he allegedly admitted raping and murdering deaf woman Emma Agnew.
The woman, who had been in a relationship with accused Liam James Reid at the time, wrote a series of text messages to
him after the alleged admission, apologising and saying "wish it was me you had done ... If you feel inclined I offer myself."
The woman was giving evidence at a depositions hearing in the Christchurch District Court to determine if Reid should stand trial for suffocating Miss Agnew and partially concealing her naked body in forest north of Christchurch last November.
Pathologist Martin Sage said a sock stuffed into Miss Agnew's throat was possibly the cause of her death, but she had other injuries such as bruising on her neck and between her legs.
It appeared she had been dragged head-first to the area where her body was found by a member of the public.
Reid's former girlfriend, who has name suppression, told the court she had gone to the police after Reid told her he raped and killed Miss Agnew and did not regret doing it.
She continued to send text messages to him afterwards raising the issue, but in replies sent from his phone, he denied making any admission.
"To whatever pig is reading this, I said nothing of the sort," one message from Reid's phone read.
Questioned by Reid's lawyer David Bunce, the woman agreed her attraction for Reid was very strong, "almost compelling".
She admitted she had been using cannabis daily, but denied ever using P (pure methamphetamine).
The woman said she believed that Reid was trying to discredit her.
"I do have a letter saying he will use what he needs to do to discredit me."
The hearing, before justices of the peace Nick Atkins and John O'Hara, may end today.
