Instead, it feels like everyone is freaking out all the time now and if I keep scrolling online, I end up freaking out too or getting frustrated, and I am starting to wonder why I even bother.
This might be a bit rich coming from me given I have been an avid user of social media and have built a career essentially adding to the noise and giving my two cents on Māori affairs.
However, being a journalist required me to consume information and speak to people including experts, so I would like to think the opinions I shared were honest and informed.
What I am seeing now, though, is so much misinformation being spread online by people who are indignant at being challenged or asked for facts.
They rarely have anything of substance to respond with and just want people to validate their views or let them be, despite how dangerous their message could be for others.
Then we look to the newspapers and radio and it's not much better. We've got national columnists using their platform to undermine authority and spread panic.
We've got major news outlets routinely publishing utter drivel from biased, outdated and irrelevant former leaders just to get a stir, and it feels irresponsible and unhelpful.
To be fair, we are approaching two years of life with Covid-19 and maybe I am tired and stressed out but it all feels toxic and ugly and does not benefit my life much at all.
The worst part is that it ends up distracting me from the most important thing of all, and that is my two little boys, who are growing so much at the moment.
This has all been playing on my mind lately, so my partner Joshua and I decided to disconnect and take the kids away last week to a remote holiday park with thermal springs.
We made a conscious effort to disengage and keep our phones off. We filled our days with swimming, eating, talking and doing nothing together, just the four of us.
It was wonderful and it made me think really hard about what kind of life I want to live.
What is important in life? What is the point of being so engaged all the time? Of having a say?
It's been a year since I started my columns for the Chronicle, just off the back of leaving my broadcasting role at RNZ.
I was still into world events and current affairs and felt educated and informed.
But priorities have shifted for me since the lockdowns. I am more interested in my family, my boys and my overall wellbeing. I no longer feel the need to know everything or to have a say.
Being constantly engaged and voicing an opinion can be draining and disrupts my peace.
I am grateful for the platform I have been able to have but it's time to take a break.
There's a saying I have always kept in mind and that's "pass the mic".
I often use it to describe the frustration of seeing a non-Māori person speak authoritatively about a Māori matter, instead of hearing from a Māori person who would be more qualified.
In essence, if you do not feel you are the best person to speak, then step aside and pass the microphone to someone else.
So here I am, passing the mic. Thanks for reading my columns the past year, Whanganui.
I hope you enjoyed them.
Go well, get vaccinated, and take care of each other.
