"If the child's safe then let it scream. That's fine, it's not
going to kill it."
That's the advice one of Counties Manukau's child abuse investigators has for parents who are struggling to deal with a difficult baby.
Detective Sergeant Colin Higson has seen all too often theeffects of a parent who has not walked away in a moment of frustration.
Often the end result is a child who suffers some sort of permanent disability for the rest of his or her life. On far too many occasions it is death that should never have happened.
Better educating parents about babies, the way they behave and how to deal with them is one of the issues people involved in the prevention of child abuse are pushing for.
Experts say parents must remember it is normal for babies to cry. They cry when they are hungry, when tired, when their nappies need changing.
The result can be an exhausted parent or adult in the house snapping and shaking the baby out of sheer frustration - but Mr Higson says there are other options.
"What's wrong with just putting the child down and walking away -
going outside for five minutes?"
Detective Inspector Sue Schwalger, who has headed many child homicide
inquiries, says there are many agencies to help struggling parents.
"There are 0800 numbers, Plunket, young parents can ring - there are
good systems in place ... it's about educating them to say you can ask for help."
