Sideswipe

We like to think that we are a pretty good company of plumbers, Microsoft competitive strategy manager Brett Roberts told a forum in Wellington on Monday. Does he mean you can never find them in an emergency, they charge like a wounded bull, and are likely to inflict an unsightly amount of bum-crack on the customer?

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Reckless moments in academia: The holidaying HoD of a prominent West Auckland college was hauled up by the Cold Cops on one of the southern lakes skifields still lucky to have a piste this winter. The offence: speeding! Next time, he was sternly cautioned, there'd be a ticket. This on the fast slope where folk like our very accomplished skier go for real fun.

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How quickly bad publicity can spread after a nasty shop-assistant experience: This is an email doing the rounds: "Hello everyone, I am emailing everyone to say if you want great service from a clothing shop DON'T go to [a central city outlet]. I just came back from there after being told not to try one of the tops on because I was 'too big' and I 'might stretch the top'. I was so mortified and all the girls in the store were laughing at me. I would hate to think that anyone else had to go through this embarrassment."

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Spooky small-screen coincidences: Last Friday night on M*A*S*H, Hawkeye was removing the leg of a famous football player wounded in Korea, while on the news that night the story broke about Tawera Nikau having his leg amputated. That was followed by the story about Michael Hurst and the breast-feeding poster. Later that night one of those CSI-type things about a woman who starved her baby to death because she couldn't breastfeed it. And then, another night on one channel was the telemovie about the murder of child beauty queen JonBenet Ramsey. On another channel at the same time? A documentary about child beauty-contest queens.

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To follow up the query from Phil Kerrison about a direct translation of the Maori words of the national anthem: Catherine Lang suggests this website: UCA Music

The free, downloadable background notes include the lyrics of the full version in both English and Maori. The Maori lyrics have been verified by the Maori Language Commissioner, Professor Timoti Karetu.


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